This page is an archive of every National Records article written to date. This page also serves to support longer articles that would normally have to be split into two or more messages due to Discord's 2000 character limit. All the original articles can be found in the #the-national-records channel on the Unterganger Minecraft Server Discord Server.

This is an ongoing project, spearheaded by QuestionTuesdayFTW, but players are encouraged to update this page with their articles or articles written by others.

Last Updated: December 1st, 2018

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Canabai hints at recognizing Zion as legitimate

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Jul 5] During Canabai Department of State's occasional press conference, Sec. of State, William Geharts, responds to a reporter's inquiry in regards to Zion's legitimacy, to which he responds:

"The state before did not recognize Zion due to underlying conflicts in between our best interests and others, however after yesterday and today's conclusion to our resolution, the state is now considering some form of expanded diplomatic relationship."

Today, the Zion crisis has reached to a resolution, by moving most of the buildings and infrastructure to another location far away in the east to avoid another conflict. Zion would be able to finally realign its plaza to its major 'ice road'. The Old Zion is completely destroyed with spectacular and almost cleaned up.

Written by: NerdieSanders

New Morioh station poses issues for rail designers

[Morioh, Jul 5] Rail designers are struggling to find a good way to redirect the rails after the construction of the new station in downtown Morioh.

"Well we built the station in the location we did, thinking the rails would be easy to divert., but once it was finished, we took a look at the map of Morioh and beyond, and realized that the new station is miles away from the old [Cowville] station," said Ugultu, designer of Morioh Central Station.

"What we have done currently," QuestionTuesdayFTW, the person in charge of laying the rails between the old Cowville Station, the new Morioh Central, and the Northeast Railway junction, "is we have ran the Eastbound lines of RT Tudor and RT Outer fully concurrent with each other from the old Cowville station going to the Northeast Railway junction via Morioh Central, now sharing the same track. They also use the same track going Westbound from the Northeast Railway to the new Morioh station, where we plan to split them back up again before heading to the old Cowville."

Crude bridges have been built in the outskirts of Morioh to take the tracks from Cowville to Morioh Central, which Morioh City Planners are expected to replace them with proper Skytrain tracks in the future. The Tudor Line will also no longer have its own platform at the Northeast Railway Station, allowing the newly built RRC Crap Line to have its own platform at the station.

RT Railway Maintainers remind you to expect delays when heading on RT Tudor or Outer lines between Cowville and Northeast Railway.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Far West Express Dilemma finished!

[San Escobar, Jul 6th] The conflict of interests on newly built section of Far West Express Line in the area of San Escobar between Redstone Railway Company and Sanostonburg Railway Authority is officially over. As the both sides admit, entire situation was a misunderstanding.

"We have not taken the operator's rank granted to SRA superior under consideration, and we sincerely apologize our colleagues from SRA for this problem." - says ParrotAntics, the head of RRC West branch.

President of San Escobar, Leoncio Almeida, did not want to comment the issue.

Written by: ParrotAntics

Zion Crisis comes to a draw, New age of peace and construction for Zion

[ZION, Zion Z1, Jul 6] After diplomatic issues with nearby cities, Zion has decided to improve it's relationships, which were constantly failing, by moving to an unpopulated plain area thus by giving up it's selfishness for the good of its relationships and peace. Today, at the plaza, an historic peace treaty was signed, ending all current political feuds and problems, the peace treaty was signed by the Founding Father of Zion: Neo.

The old Zion was destroyed with commands and TNT, the plaza was destroyed with TNT and fireworks, celebrating the end of all conflicts, after that, an air raid destroyed some of the buildings, while Boatlev lines were destroyed with TNT and the hyperloop vaporized.

This is the start of a new era for Zion, an age of innovation, expansion, and construction

"Zion's moving has caused the nearby cities to accept Zion as a city part of the server, not as a tyrant, that sucks up city space without permission, carelessly, Zion has proved its Star only wants peace, and the need to avoid conflicts that could damage the server we live in, the number of our allies has doubled, and the number of our enemies has been almost zeroed, Zion will probably have a good overall reputation on the server, as a pacifist, not as a tyrant, a star that shines very far, without blinding anyone."

Written by: F.F. Of Zion Neo

Canabai Parliament approves $15 billion for continuation of Tagor-Morioh Expressway

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Jul 6] The parliament passes a spending bill for the expressway connecting Tagor and Morioh after relentless debates on whether or not the government should invest in infrastructure internationally.

The governing party, the National Coalition Party, who is the primary proponents of the resolution, stated that with such investments would greatly boost Morioh and Tagor's economic prosperity, and thus benefiting Canabai via free trade. Reporters have asked the party's representative what they meant by "via free trade" and so far, none of the MPs gave an answer.

The main opponents, Social Democrats and the Green Party, are strongly against the bill, suggesting that the money could be spent on providing either Levanski, Kovansberg, or Gaxington for housing. "If they insist on transportation," one Soc Dem MP said, "then we should build a new metro for Levanski or a new train line connecting Canabai City to Levanski." The Green Party suggested either a train line, or using the newest technology of Menschbahn or Hyperloop to "minimize environment destruction."

The polls released by Canabai Times suggested that the majority of the population in Canabai are against the resolution, and that they preferred to see newer investments in the country. "We're having so many things to worry about internally," one citizen reported. "The Opera House Restoration, Gaxington and its tennis center that we need, Levanski's Science Laboratory? Those are the things we should focus on, instead of building some roads half the world away that no one is going to use."

The Tagor-Morioh Expressway is reportedly 25% finished, and that it is expected to be finished within the next two weeks in the best case scenario. This expressway is Canabai's largest infrastructure project, after the construction of the Canabai Loop that connects Newport, Levanski, and south of Canabai City.

Written by: NerdieSanders

Dorklich to become '100% survival-friendly'

[DORKLICH, Jul 6] The Mayor of Dorklich, KrebsLovesFiesh, released a declaration, announcing the introduction of survival-friendly structures to the city's building code, such as ladders and stairs.

The mayor during a press conference has stated that doing this would provide access to all parts of the city to 'players that get thottified with [survival mode].' The mayor does not expect the new regulation to beautify the city and that it 'may as well make the city look a bit uglier.' When asked if this is a statement for competition with other cities, KrebsLovesFiesh said it is not.

During the press conference, Sanostonburg's Mayor Office released a short official statement, saying "[Sanostonburg] has same regulations; every structure is accessible with gamemode 0, except WIP ones."

Written by: NerdieSanders

Ottoburg under quarantine due to Server Crash Disease epidemic

[Unterganger City, Jul 6] The city of Ottoburg in the server's Northeast has been put under quarantine due to an ongoing Server Crash Disease epidemic. The epidemic was first discovered by Ugultu shortly after he arrived there for business. Upon arriving, he was immediately plagued with computer crashes, server fires, and eternal rage, among other symptoms of Server Crash Disease.

"As far as we know, Ugultu is still stuck in Ottoburg, and we're worried that attempts to extradite him back will result in more staff being exposed and ultimately succumbing to the disease," said Einstein, Ugultu's close friend. "Thankfully, Server Crash Disease is non-fatal when contracted, allowing Ugultu to inform us about the epidemic. but curing the disease is easier said than done."

"Server Crash Disease doesn't spread through the air," Chief Medical Officer NerdieSanders commented. "To cure it, people must be taken out of the affected area, which is only doable with a hazmat team. We don't know how Server Crash Disease arises in given areas, but we are continuing research to ultimately eradicate this disease."

All travel from Ottoburg is restricted to all travelers until further notice. The hazmat team has been deployed and is expected to arrive by Saturday.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Gaxington now known as Altholz

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Jul 6] A recent discovery within the town of Gaxington has prompt the city council to change its name to Altholz. The discovery was found by Ugultu within the town's train station, as the original name of the town was engraved on the wall of the station. He then promptly brought the matter to the city council and after a brief process, the city council unanimously voted to change its name to Altholz.

"In this town, we are supposed to preserve our deep root origins," the mayor said, during the announcement. "By changing to our original name that our ancestors had used long before, we are achieving that faithful purpose." Regarding to the nearby FLaMInGO Lab, the mayor said that they would still retain the Gaxington name.

The name Gaxington came about when Canabai travelers came through this town and named the town Gaxington after looking up the stars and without noticing the name in the old train station.

Written by: NerdieSanders

Zion approves act to gas all bronies

[ZION CAPITAL, Zion, Jun 7] After the Founding Father of Zion got accused of being a brony, Neo decided to take the matter in his own hands, after correctly evaluating if bronies are rightful by doing what they do, they are not All future bronies in Zion or annexed shall be gassed at sight, the Capital is already building the first camp.

Neo, the new Hitler? Or just a wannabe?

Written by: Neo

Dorklich tightens border security

[Customs and Immigration Headquarters, Dorklich, July 7th] After the news that Zion is exterminating all bronies, Dorklich border guard officers will be hightening their alertness due to the possible influx of brony immigrants. All forms of travel to Dorklich by Zion citizens is now strictly prohibited. RRC rail lines originating from any Zion sectors will be closed. God bless you, god bless Dorklich.

Written by: KrebsLovesFiesh

Zion sends well trained police officers and patrol to Dorklich

[Dorklich, July 7th] After the ongoing Brony crisis, which started after a brony escaped and stole 30 horses front heir owners, Zion has decided to help Krebs guard his city from escaping citizens, all RRC Lines are guarded by at least one Zion inspector or agent.

Written by: Neo

RRC Plans a new railway for the northern sector

[RRC Central Headquarters, July 6th] The founder of RRC, KrebsLovesFiesh, is planning the construction of a railway servicing the northern part of the server. The first stop will be located in Eston Post (Eastern Observatory station) and will end at the server border.

Written by: KrebsLovesFiesh

SRA to connect 6 districts of Sanostonburg

[SRA-in-Junkers Tower, July 7th] Speaker of SRA, Alden Aden, has announced construction of a new railway line serving 6 districts (Mainland, Sacramento, Havilland, Springfield, Ourla, Gulf Area) in near future, "In order to increase growth rate of those districts" Alden said.

"SRA has been assisting other railways or working on other places than Sanostonburg for a long while, It is time to get back to where we belong."

Written by: Ugultu

Controversy arises from new claim of the entire server

[Viktoria, Jul 7] A new land claim covering the entire server has sparked controversy from all parts of the server. KrebsLovesFiesh announced his new land claim, covering the entirety of the server today.

"Today is a great day, as Dorklich will begin to annex other towns throughout the server until the entire place is the City, and eventually, Kingdom of Dorklich. All other towns will cease to exist, and bow down to me, the King of the Kingdom of Dorklich!," said KrebsLovesFiesh during today's press conference, where he made the announcement.

News outlets and social media were flooded with concerned citizens throughout the server following the conference. Many leaders also disapproved of the move, calling it a frivolous act of hostility.

"KrebsLovesFiesh is wasting his time. He does not understand that I have already laid claim to the entire server. I have absolute veto power across the entire server to shut down builds that I feel do not fit in the server. I am the original claimant to the entire server. It is to my great chagrin that most cities in the UMS exist today," Viktoria leader Tudor told The National Records.

Canabai Leader NerdieSanders, Zion Leader Neo, and Port Random Leader RDPIsOnCrack also denounced the move Saturday.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Altholz Tennis Center under construction

[ALTHOLZ, Canabai, Jul 7] After the removal of the old Gaxington Tennis Club for the expansion of the town, the mayor promised to rebuild a tennis center to attract more tourism to the town with tournaments comparable to the Wilhelm Kemp Open in Sanostonburg.

And now, he's fulfilling that promise.

On the Highway 1 from Levanski to Canabai City, we can already see the Centre Court popping up from the ground with its retractable roof, constructed by the same company that built Court Rafa Nadal in Wilhelm Kemp Tennis Center. More side courts are soon to be built, but we are unable to determine whether or not there will be a secondary court, similar to Court No. 9 in the Wilhelm Kemp.

Altholz Tennis Center under construction

The Centre Court with areas north of Highway 1 to be filled with tennis facility. Altholz can be seen in the background.

Some town residents are welcoming this return of the tennis spirit of the town. "It's nice to see some sport events in here," one said. "We have great lands that large corporations can invest in, instead of Canabai City, which is having rising costs and what not." Another resident said, "We all should have some sort of sport culture in all towns and cities. The tennis center should do that just fine."

Others are not so sure, due to the fact that the old Gaxington Tennis Club halted the town's expansion. "Not only the club is only accessible to Canabai's highest elites, but we weren't able to build our town," the local librarian complained. "It's unacceptable, and some of us are pretty sure that this is going to happen again, especially how the new tennis center is taking so much more land from us this time." Later, he also added with a grunt, "This new mayor better bring us lots of tourists so we have the funds to build our town to become a city."

Land claim in jeopardy!

[Temporary Embassy of San Escobar, Hotel Tarrantia, Jul 8th]

The problem of western lands' claim is still going on. After rejection of first claim, another corrected claim was submitted by ParrotAntics, Deputy Mayor of Tarrantia and delegate of San Escobar's Ambassador.

Unfortunately, despite meeting requirements of bringing previous claims of QT under consideration, operators of the server find the planned claim enormous and delay the confirmation of it. PA proposed operators a right to decrease the size of the claim to an extent they wish to accept, but so far none of operators commented that move or even used this right.

President of San Escobar, Leoncio Almeida, claims that the prolonging conflict between PA and mods can drive San Escobar into destruction, as they are still endangered by armed forces of San Cristobal y Nieves. Col. Jose Arcadio Morales, San Escobar Defense Minister, claims that their forces must protect the citizens, and begs UMS operators for faster closure of this hiatus.

From Tarrantia, Marius Max Kolonko, I say how it is.

Written by: Marius Max Kolonko

The National Records West Headquarter established in old Canabai Times Building

[Canabai City, CANABAI, Jul 8] The newspaper now has a headquarters located in Canabai City downtown after acquiring Canabai's national newspaper. The mayor of Canabai, Jude York, welcomed this change to the news outlet industry in Canabai and the surrounding area, saying, "The new headquarter will bring in greater content to the people of Canabai, Levanski, Athyras, and so forth. Not only the people will be more informed, but the industry will also prosper as well." The Prime Minister's Office also congratulated the newspaper actions within the city.

The headquarter used to be housed in a small underground bunker hidden within Canabai, and continuously publishing papers to the city's residents. The paper greatly expanded its contents and readership when it reported international news and afterwards, got big enough to acquire Canabai Times.

At the opening of the headquarter, the West Editor of NR, Cohen Stephens, revealed the newspaper's plans for the future. "We are looking to expand to the Greater East area, and we have candidate cities in mind. The final city will have a similar headquarter like this one [in Canabai City], and there will be another East Editor." He also added that the reason for this is to make logistics simpler, instead of one large headquarter that is out of reach to most new, growing cities.

"I believe that this will greatly increase our readership throughout the server, and through that, would further inform the people here and make informed decisions," he said.

Written by: NerdieSanders

Four new additions to Canabai Museum of Arts valued at $12 million total

[Canabai City, CANABAI, Jul 8] The Canabai Museum of Arts purchased four new paintings at $12 million, the museum's director announced in a press conference.

"We are extremely very happy to announce that we are filling up the first level of the museum with more paintings," the director said with great enthusiasm. He then later revealed the paintings and added, "These paintings will bring in more cultural value to the city, and that we're hoping to see more tourists and visitors to come in the museum and enjoy these paintings like we do."

The paintings in question are: Botero's Dog, Zaha Hadid's KMR Art and Media Centre, Augusto Ferrer-Dalmau's Carga del Escuadron Real de Carlos VII, and Mark Bryant's Village Church with Flying Saucer. The latter painting seemed to excite the audience that attended the press conference.

One museum-goer agreed with the director, that the museum has 'great paintings with all kinds of styles' for people to embrace, including ones that are very abstract. Written by: NerdieSanders

RT Service Disruptions end as the Westbound lines from Morioh Central open for passengers

[Morioh, Jul 8] RT Rail Designers unveiled the new westbound lines going from Morioh Central to the old Cowville station today, ending the service disruptions RT faced while rerouting the Outer and Tudor lines to the new Morioh Central station.

"We've done some test runs, and based on the current frequency of the trains, as this section of the lines aren't traveled on very often," QuestionTuesdayFTW said at the opening ceremony today, "we are very pleased with the execution of the rerouting of the tracks for the time being."

RT travelers heading Eastbound from Cowville will follow their respective lines, whether Tudor or Outer, before the tracks merge and the two lines continue together towards Morioh Central and ultimately the terminus of the Tudor line at the Northeast Railway. From the Northeast Railway, the lines continue concurrent with each other, and passengers will be expected to get off at Morioh Central to continue on their journey, regardless of what line they are travelling on. RT Rail Designers are working on a long term plan to separate the tracks so that trains heading into Morioh Central and trains heading out of Morioh Central do not share the same tracks.

Travelers are still advised to expect longer travel times, as signs at all stations get updated, Morioh City Planners upgrade the Skytrain tracks carrying the trains to Morioh Central, and the NE Railway Station is renovated to remove the separate Tudor line platform (Due to the new concurrency), allowing RRC Crap Line to be moved into that platform instead. Travelers are also advised that the new station adds about an extra 5 minutes to your commute when travelling through Eastbound, and 7 minutes Westbound.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Tagor-Morioh Expressway opens with great traffic

[TAGOR, JUL 8] The expressway connecting two cities has opened to the public after great delay from Canabai Constructions.

"It is a humble honor to finish this highway," Prime Minister Nerdie Sanders announced at the ribbon cutting in Tagor. "In the past three days, we have seen the fastest speed of constructing the expressway, from 10% to completely finished. We have shown enough how spectacularly fast our construction crew are, and how skillful they are now compared to in the past."

The Mayor of Tagor, @resident furry, said, "Thanks to this newly built highway, we are now able to travel to Morioh more directly; and because of this, we will soon prosper with great growth. Sooner or later, we will all see an expansion boom right here, in Tagor."

The leaders hinted a further expansion of the highway all the way to Port Random. Deputy Mayor of Morioh, @pokemon, revealed that the new highway to Port Random is under planning. PM Nerdie Sanders added that this planned highway will directly connect Canabai 'to Morioh and to Tagor directly' without having to travel through Athyras.

"Sooner or later," he said, "we will see an increasing growth speed that we have never seen for 2 years."

Written by: NerdieSanders

Zion Invades Hasbro

[Zion, Jul 9] Founding Father of Zion Neo has declared war to Hasbro and its supporters after discovering the latter made a MLP character about him

Its military is already laying down plans to attack and bomb the headquarters, located in Dorklich

"Its outrageous, a scandal, its absurd, now everyone will consider my real name a fucking pony"

The war is expected to start anytime and zion has plans to raise its secret dome to protect the capital from attacks...

Written by: Neo

Altholz Tennis Center finally opens to the public

[ALTHOLZ, Canabai, Jul 9] After two days of construction by Canabai Constructions right in front of the old town of Altholz, the tennis center is finally opened to the public. ====

With total of 11 tennis courts, including 2 large capacity courts equipped with rooms for press conferences and high-end showers, 3 practice courts, and a broadcasting center made this the second tennis complex in the server, after the Wilhelm Kemp Tennis Complex. Both tennis centers are built by Canabai Constructions.

"We are extremely happy to open the tennis center today," said Mayor of Altholz, Mauno Hansen. "The public is now able to enjoy another fantastic sport in Canabai and with the Canabai Open around the corner, we are expecting loads of tennis enthusiasts to come to our town and enjoy their stay here!"

Canabai's Minister of Sports, Klaus Garret, who also attended the grand opening, said that he is thrilled to have another sport addition to Canabai. "Whenever we build these complex, the area generates a lot of revenue that we can spend for the surrounding infrastructure. Like Mr. Hansen has said, the town of Altholz will benefit greatly from this new tennis center, and especially with the Canabai Open, not only famed tennis players will promote the town, but tourists will also come into the town and check it out."

Mr. Garret then later drank Altholz' landmark beer to a cheering crowd.

Altholz Tennis Center - Circular Court

The Circular Court of the Altholz Tennis Center, overlooking the picturesque Fevre mountains

The townspeople responded to this grand opening with glee. "The facility looked fantastic," one said. "It's even better when we are gifted with free tickets to check out the Canabai Open!" he added.

One also said before rushing into the town square, "I should get going to learn about tennis because honestly, I have no idea what 'tennis' is, but it sure does looked exciting."

Written by: NerdieSanders

San Escobar Officially Estabilished!

[Los Vipleros Gov-Tower, San Escobar, Jul 10th]

At 12 PM UTC+2, President of San Escobar, Leoncio Almeida, officially signed a decree, where western lands on UMS will be now under control of San Escobar, and the temporary capital will be set in the town of Los Vipleros. "We are home! Thanks to wonderful people in this area, we can now say: We are home!!!" - said Almeida.

Minister of Transportation, Juan Lanos, declared readiness of San Escobar government for negotiations with Canabai about building an expressway connecting both states. He also stated, that construction of production plant in Espero de Nubira will begin according to plans: on July 12th.

Los Vipleros will serve as temporary capital till the construction of Santo Subito city will be finished. "We already plan the look of buildings for government purposes. They shall express escobarian spirit." - said Zeta Jones, Minister of Culture and Architecture.

More informations will be added in future. Marius Max Kolonko, I say how it is. From Los Vipleros.

Written by: Marius Max Kolonko

Republic of E Established

[Duloc, Republic of E, Jul 10] Sanostonburg Prime Minister Ugultu announced today the establishment of the Republic of E. Duloc, the intended capital city, begins construction.

"Today is a wonderful day, as we establish the second country in the UMS, the Republic of E!" said Ugultu during the press conference today in Junkers Tower, where he made the announcement. "The Republic of E will be a powerhouse in the East of the server, and will hopefully bring new developments to the sparsely populated East."

It should be noted that Sanostonburg itself will not be part of the Republic of E or vice versa.

Written by: Ugultu

Canabai trolls Dorklich by manipulating it's TP booth

[Dorklich, July 12th, 2018] The head of government of Dorklich has ranted over Canabai's leader trolling the people of Dorklich by having a block that kills them when they step foot onto the TP booth. The Embassy of Canabai to Dorklich has been temporarily closed and will remain so for another 10 days. All diplomats from the embassy has been kicked out.

Written by: KrebsLovesFiesh

Canabai Dept. of State denies shenanigans

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, July 12] The Secretary of State delivered a statement at today's press conference with regards to the Dorklich teleport booth incident, saying "We are in no ways directed this shenanigans. The responsibility falls on the dead town north of Dagstorp, not us."

The 'dead town north of Dagstorp' in question is QuestionTuesdayFTW's town under construction.

The Secretary also said that deporting Canabaian diplomats is "unecessary" and "unfair". "The diplomats should and must be welcomed back. Like I said, we are not responsible for these shenanigans."

More to come.

Written by: NerdieSanders

City of Solaris established, is immediately accused of shenanigans

[Old Newport, Jul 12] QuestionTuesdayFTW announced today the establishment of the City of Solaris, in the Southwest of the server.

"For over a year, I've been dealing with builder's block, and my land claim stood empty. Soon, however, the City of Solaris will rise, and become the greatest thing the far West of the server has seen!," said QuestionTuesdayFTW, at a press conference at Old Newport, which to this day still stands as his biggest project.

The press conference was later interrupted while QuestionTuesdayFTW was answering questions from reporters, by KrebsLovesFiesh, as he stormed onto stage, stole the mic from his hands, and accused him of sabotaging Dorklich's teleporter booth at the teleporter hub.

"You set up a system that when people would teleport to Dorklich, they would land on a pressure plate that would trigger a mechanism that would immediately kill them. You are a disgrace of a leader and I will veto every single proposal that you put out!," KrebsLovesFiesh yelled at to the crowd and to QuestionTuesdayFTW, before security managed to apprehend him and remove him from the stage.

With order brought back to the press conference, QuestionTuesdayFTW immediately denied the accusations made by Dorklich, instead deferring blame to de facto Morioh Leader AlphaSkyRaider. QuestionTuesdayFTW also vowed to veto all proposals that Dorklich would put out at the UMS council. "We will not have friendly relations with Dorklich until they apologize for the disruption they have caused today.," commented QuestionTuesdayFTW before concluding the press conference.

A detailed plan on the construction as well as the government structure and policies of Solaris is expected to be released over the next few weeks.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Canabai starts construction of Expressway 102/Highway 2 South and Expressway 111 Expansion

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Jul 12] Canabai Constructions has started its new highway project, connecting Canabai, San Escobar, and the small town of Fodania, Minister of Transportation, Keiran Henderson announced in a press conference, along with San Escobar's representative, ParrotAntics, and Fodania's representative, WQ_Josh.

"We are extremely thrilled to start the project which will very much so benefit all parties involved in the project," said Mr. Henderson. "We hope, and especially the Canabai government, that this connection will strengthen our diplomatic relationship in between Canabai, San Escobar, and Fodania."

San Escobar in general had a very positive mood. "All in all, this is what we hoped for, and this is what we will have," said @Prt (seen JoJo P5 anime) at the conference.

Fodania's representative only came to the podium and said, "Thanks." Canabai representatives clapped cheerfully.

The project consists of Expressway 102 South, extending to a bit south of the Canabai Airport until becoming Highway 2, heading towards Fodania. Expressway 111 would go from Los Vipleros and eastward until the interchange at the 102.

Written by: NerdieSanders

Dorklich to permanently close Embassy of Canabai

[Dorklich, July 13th] "All lying thots must be removed so I hereby permanently close the Embassy of Canabai unless if they step forward and admit whatever the heck that they're doing"

Written by: KrebsLovesFiesh

Dorklich invites back Canabaian diplomats and issues an apology

[July 13th, 2018] After reports that Canabai didn't do anything wrong, the Dorklich government will focus it's retaliation on Old Newport. Orders to close the Embassy of Canabai are no longer valid.

Written by: KrebsLovesFiesh

Solaris proposes a peace agreement with Dorklich

[Solaris, Jul 13] Solaris Leader QuestionTuesdayFTW released a report today outlining the details of Solaris' Foreign Policy with other towns and countries throughout the server. The most interesting thing to come out of the report is a supposed peace agreement, where "if Dorklich agrees to the agreement, they will recognize Solaris as a city, half all attempts to block Solaris' entrance into the UMS Council, stop all vetoes of their proposals for the sake of vetoes, and issue a formal apology for interrupting Solaris' first press conference."

It is rumoured that in return for accepting the terms of this agreement, Solaris will be more welcoming to Dorklich, dropping rumoured travel bans on Dorklich residents, due to QuestionTuesdayFTW implying that he was somewhat against Dorklich's infrastructure, government structure, and the city itself, as well as its leader, KrebsLovesFiesh. Solaris is also expected to accept full responsibility for the Teleport Booth Incident, also issuing a formal apology for the Incident, and vow to never prank Dorklich or KrebsLovesFiesh in the future, if the peace agreement is ratified. Finally, Solaris is expected to make some sort of reparation payment to Dorklich, building or other, if the agreement is accepted by both parties.

Other details included in today's report include a construction of a Government District in Solaris, which will house embassies, consulates, Solaris City Hall, and numerous hotels, as well as a mansion, for government leaders to stay in. Planned embassies at the moment include the Canabai Embassy, housed in the Temple of GAT SA ROBAT OH REBAT (Alternate Name: Temple of NERDIE FUCKING SANDERS), and the Embassy for the Republic of E, which is unnamed at the moment.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Dorklich issues a hastily made apology

[Dorklich, July 14th] Dorklich has issued a formal apology which was made in about 3 minutes due to the urgency of the matter. The apology letter reads "God damn it QT, I'm sorry for being angry about you pranking me, and I'm very very sorry for being a dickhead about you being so god damned awful against my city. Dorklich has recognized Solaris since it's first day of existence, but you ain't noticed because we haven't told you, so fuck it, I'm sorry."

Written by: KrebsLovesFiesh

Solaris admits to Teleport Booth Incident, issues formal apology to Dorklich

[Solaris, Jul 13] Solaris Leader QuestionTuesdayFTW issued from his office a statement which acknowledged and took responsibility for the Teleport Booth Incident, where upon teleporting to Dorklich, one would land on a pressure plate which would kill them, effectively making Dorklich inaccessible without walking.

The statement "[admits] full responsibility for the Teleport Booth Incident, and [QuestionTuesdayFTW is] deeply sorry for any grief that this may have caused [KrebsLovesFiesh], as well as anyone attempting to access Dorklich while the event was occurring." It also touches base on the tensions between Dorklich and Solaris as a result of the incident, and "[QuestionTuesdayFTW], on behalf of Solaris, will vow to no longer prank Dorklich or KrebsLovesFiesh in the future. ... Solaris is pleased that Dorklich has accepted our Peace Agreement, and we would like to offer Dorklich and KrebsLovesFiesh a reparation payment, be it the form of a building or other."

QuestionTuesdayFTW declined to comment following the statement.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Zion claims rails are part of land claims, causing massive issues server wide

[Zion, Jul 13] In an effort to stop the construction of Hasbro, despite being over a kilometer away, Zion announced that rails are part of land claims, including his MB system. Anything within 30 blocks of a rail line is now classified as territory of the rail company, which in turn is territory of the country or city in which the rail company is headquartered.

While this allowed Zion to halt construction of Hasbro, this blindsided announcement has caused massive headaches for residents and commuters of the server alike, especially to cities like Morioh and Arthyras, which do not have their own rail systems. Within an hour of the announcement, Unterganger City announced that all stations under the RTN (Except RT Central and all stations within Unterganger City) are to be demolished, citing that "most stations in the RTN are so unmaintained that it brings shame to our rail system.

Canabai Transit and Port Random Transit objected to the move by the RTN, saying that it affected a number of stations in their systems, while also calling it an act of hostility. Commuters were also getting confused as the RTN, the largest transit system in the server, began putting signs everywhere that they were in Unterganger City. Despite signs telling people what station they were at, people were convinced that they were wrong, as every station stated that they were in Unterganger City.

Residents were also confused, as a quarter of the population of the server found themselves living in a different city then they were yesterday. Many riots were staged at city halls throughout the server.

The UMS Council has been called to order in an emergency meeting to resolve the issue as soon as possible.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Issue with Hasbro and Zion temporarily resolved

[Morioh, Jul 14] The mayor of Morioh, AlphaSkyRaider, who also owns part of Hasbro has signed a deal with Zion saying that the mayor of Zion, Neo, has to build the rest of the University Of Morioh to Delphox's liking before August 1st. If this is done, then Delphox will move Hasbro to another location.

Written by: Delphox

Port Random signals invasion towards Newport and Canabai City using railway claim loophole

[Newport, Jul 14] Rails acting as claims for towns are causing greater headaches for residents in the West of the server, as Port Random signals an invasion towards Newport and Canabai City.

"With Newport [Central] and Canabai Palace being served by the PRT, citizens of Canabai City and Newport are worried that Port Random will use the new railway claim loophole to invade and aggressively expand their territory," Canabai Leader NerdieSanders told The National Records. "People are starting to barge into Fort Newport to 'militarize and defend themselves from transport freaks,' as one of my advisers told me a resident at Fort Newport told him. Riots are happening in Newport, which endangers the Monorail, and the biggest protests in Canabai's history are happening as we speak, around the National Square, Palace Mall, and in front of Canabai Palace station. It's very dangerous for citizens."

The Prime Minister's office is working through the weekend to try to calm down residents. The government has also filed a dispute to the UMS Court, hoping that they can get the loophole closed soon. Port Random has implied that the CMOA will be raided soon if the issue is not resolved in the near future. Port Random militants have already mobilized near DMT Park, only escalating residents' concerns. The Port Random Army is also marching on Expressway 100 towards Canabai Port, in an attempt to block further trade.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

UMS Council puts an end to the Railway Claim Loophole madness

[Unterganger City, Jul 14] The Court of UMS put an end to the madness that arose from the Railway Claim Loophole. Judge QuestionTuesdayFTW ruled that rail lines and other transport systems were not to be used as extensions to land claims outside of a town's borders, even going as far as to modify the Server Constitution (Rules) to explain as such.

Rail Dispute Agreement

The press released version of the contract that was ratified earlier today.

"Zion originally claimed that their Zion MB was a part of the original Zion claim, meaning that they were allowed to use it to halt construction of Hasbro. Unfortunately, Leader Neo did not see the repercussions of his actions, and as a result, a majority of the server was put under threat due to both Unterganger City and Port Random claiming that the RTN and the PRT were part of their land claims." Judge QuestionTuesdayFTW said in the courtroom. "Because of his haste actions to halt construction of Hasbro, Neo will need to make a repatriation payment to the main leader of Hasbro, AlphaSkyRaider, in the form of a University (to his liking) in Morioh. In return, Hasbro will halt all construction and prepare a new land claim away from Zion."

The Court of UMS also ruled that the Fegeline and the Zion MB, both in the server's Northeast, were the only exceptions to the rule due to mutual settlement. The RTN retracted their ultimatum for all stations outside of Unterganger City proper to be destroyed, and the Port Random Military is in the process of withdrawing from Newport and Canabai City.

During deliberation, Judge NerdieSanders. who originally took on the case, became very frustrated with the two parties to the point where he stormed out of the courtroom, leaving Judge QuestionTuesdayFTW to take over the trial.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Duloc established

[Duloc, Jul 14] Since Republic of E is aborted, however Duloc will be built as soon as possible by Ugultu. Lord Farquaad said "E" in his press conference.

Written by: Ugultu

Dispute over Zion MB Continues, Threatening War

[Dorklich, Jul 15] After a peace treaty between Hasbro and Zion was made, it turns out that Zion has now claimed any area that is even in view distance of the MB line. The representatives of Hasbro, as well as the mayor of Dorklich have not agreed to this in the contract and chances are the contract was modified either intentionally or by mistake.

The mayor of Hasbro claimed the contract stated that Zion's MB line would only have a claim against Hasbro and STB's Fegeline boatlev would only have a claim against Zion. However, a likely mistake in communication caused the server OPs to believe that the MB and Fegeline has claims over the entire area in general.

This misunderstanding has caused a new player to have significant difficulties claiming a land that is at a moderate distance from Zion's MB line. It was found that if these lines do end up getting claims over everyone, that half of the build area to the east would not be accessable without permission of the ones who have built these lines.

Following this incident, the mayor of Dorklich, also known as the CEO of the Redstone Railway Company, threatened to claim all areas near any rail he has built as protest to this change in the rules of the contract. He also says that he will blow up anything that he does not like near his rails, including anything Zion related.

This latest incident has escalated the tensions between Zion and the other settlements. The DEFCON scale drops from 3 to 2, which means that a war could break out at any moment. The mayors of Canabai and Solaris are meeting up for a discussion on what to do about their neighbors in the east and how they can bring back peace on the server.

Written by: Delphox

UMS Court of Appeal temporally impeaches multiple leaders in unprecedented end to Railway Claim Drama

[Unterganger City, Jul 15] The UMS Court of Appeal ruled 4-3 to temporally impeach (ban) Zion Leader Neo, Morioh Leader AlphaSkyRaider, and Dorklich Leader KrebsLovesFiesh, for their roles in the ongoing Railway Claim Drama. It also saw Judge (OP) Ugultu temporally removed from his judge position.

"Well, needless to say, that after QuestionTuesdayFTW convinced me to come back into the courtroom after the parties frustrated me during the initial trial surrounding the Railway Claim Drama, a new trial had to be started almost right away as there were accusations of the terms of the original agreement being breached," Judge NerdieSanders wrote in a coed.

"It's really frustrating that we have to do this, since this is a ruling we normally would not issue. However, the amount of drama we've had to deal with the past few days, especially as RDPIsOnCrack has been away for the past few days, is ridiculous. All of us here in the court are sick and tired of resolving disputes between all four parties only for them to come back a few hours later with another dispute," Judge QuestionTuesdayFTW in a separate coed wrote.

"I miss the old days," Judge Tudor commented in a third coed, "Less people, not as much activity, but as least there wasn't a drama every 3 hours. This drama is probably the worse in the UMS' history, worse than when Molster tried to blow up the entire server."

All four leaders will be expected to make repatriation payments to the server at a later date. The week long impeachment will give the leaders some time to think about their actions as well as allow the UMS council to deliberate and come up with a final solution in peace.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

RRC Crap Line ordered removed by UMS Council

[Morioh, Jul 15] Shortly after the announcement made by the UMS Court of Appeal which impeached several leaders. the UMS Council ordered Dorklich's RRC Crap Line, stretching from Eston Post to Arthryas, removed for "being a massive eyesore due to all the redstone blocks being used."

"Well, to be quite frank, when NerdieSanders and I ordered this, we disagreed on whether the RRC Crap Line should be removed or redone. Ultimately, we decided that the City of Solaris and the Republic of Canabai were going to impose further sanctions on Dorklich and leader KrebsLovesFiesh for the dramas that played out over the past few days." QuestionTuesdayFTW told The National Records after the announcement.

The sanctions put forward by the Republic of Canabai and the City of Solaris prevent Dorklich and the RRC from rebuilding any portion of the Crap Line "unless KrebsLovesFiesh is able to surprise both Solaris and Canabai with a new design that is not such an eyesore." Even when this is achieved, the Crap Line will only be allowed to be re-established 1 station at a time, with pre-approval from the UMS Council on where these stations may be.

Today's ruling from the UMS Council is the first of several expected to be made this week in the wake of the Railway Claim Drama.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Rainbow Bloc Party created after stadium renovation

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Jul 16] A new LGBT-oriented party has created after the removal of the "rainbow roof" in Canabai Stadium for a newer roof.

"Today is a great day for all of us gays here, standing in the Rainbow Square. And we all can agree on one thing," said the founder, Brandon Gaylord, whose last name was intentionally changed in protest of a name restriction rule. "Make Canabai Gay Again!" Gaylord was responded to with a loud cheering echo that can be heard throughout the city's downtown.

The party represents the LGBT minority in Canabai, who seeks for more LGBT recognition and rights in the country. When asked how they're going to achieve the new level of recognition, Gaylord responded, "We've been thinking of putting gay banners, creating a pride event and fun marches throughout the City and Levanski, and even making purchasing the rainbow flag free for everyone. The most ambitious idea we're having is creating a town called Gay, where everything is pretty much g a y." We're not sure how Gaylord created the aesthetics in his interview but it is rumored that it is a skill only gay people can have. Of course, with a new party comes with newer opposition. "This is absurd," said Andrew Anderson, party leader of Canabai Front. "They are all going to make the rest of us gay. Today, they might put us in rainbow filled rooms, tomorrow they might even strip our pants and penetrate us with their dildos!" Their party supporters seemed to support all of his homophobic statements.

Sam Jarovy, party leader of Social Democratic Party, supported the move, but with some doubt in his mind. "I love the gays and the lesbians, they're all nice to hang out with. However, of course we'll have some of them leaving our party and joining the Rainbow Bloc. Voters will still have the option to vote for both the Rainbow Bloc and the SocDems, so I'm fine with that. Maybe we'll see a more diverse representation in the Parliament."

When asked if he would add gay Ministers in his government if his party wins the most likely hung election, Jarovy replied, "We here at SocDem are always looking for experience, but if we must have a coalition with the Rainbow Bloc, we can always support and train them."

Written by: NerdieSanders

New-Old Railway Opened!!!

[RRC Central HQ, Eston Post, Jul 16th] After decision of UMS Council from July 15th to demolish the first Redstone Railway Company railway - Crap Line, and shortening it to Flaghenge in Morioh and changing redstone blocks to stone, it was thought the railway days are counted. Yet the hope shined again. And it's name is ParrotAntics. Newly estabilished CEO of RRC intervened and stopped demolition of Crap Line, promising it's general reconstruction. And he succeeded within one day.

"We are gathering here to present the new era. A new era of RRC railways! An era of aesthetics and efficiency!" - said PA on the opening ceremony of Orchid Express - a newly built railway that goes in trace of old Crap Line.

An Orchid Express line was thought as reconstruction of the Crap Line to meet the standards of aesthetics, but it turned out to become much more efficient and passenger friendly as well. The new line leads from Eastern Observatory Station in Eston Post (the important hub in RRC grid) to newly constructed Morioh Central station, stopping only at Turdsburg interchange with Rail Transit Outer Line. The stops at Flaghenge and Morioh were disassembled, and the new line runs on the stone viaduct supported by "fork pillars". The major upgrade is the layout - entire line is 2-track, unlike monotrack predecessor.

"The construction of the line would be impossible without help of Mr Ugultu from SRA, who designed the Turdsburg station platform for Orchid Express. I'm glad RRC can have such reliable partner, though we should be considered as rivals on the market. And I want to thank SRA and their leadership!" - said ParrotAntics. He also expressed his concern that the refurbished railway will meet the expectations of Canabai and Solaris leaders, who ordered demolition of Crap Line in it's original shape.

Marius Max Kolonko, I say how it is!

Written by: ParrotAntics

RT finishes stage one of line upgrades heading into Morioh Central

[Morioh, Jul 16] RT Rail Designers, in partnership with Morioh City Officials, have completed Stage 1 of the rail upgrades originally proposed by RT Designers shortly after the new branch of rails were opened to Morioh Central.

"I'm very happy that we were finally able to get this project rolling. Even though we are the original Railway Company in the UMS, the ordering of RRC Crap Line demolished scared us simply because we did not have the time to make the rails heading to Morioh Central look nice during construction." Lead designer QuestionTuesdayFTW said following the announcement.

Stage one upgraded the RT Tudor and Outer lines in Urban Morioh such that they are now supported and lay on new blocks of track, all on quartz blocks. Stage two will deal with the portion of the lines within rural Morioh, and stage three will deal with the parts of these lines outside of Morioh. Stage three, however, is not expected to be started anytime soon, as efforts will be made to better streamline the rails in this area.

Travelers are asked to expect delays when traveling in and out of Morioh Central.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Parliament of Morioh starts renovation and expansion

[Morioh, Jul 18] The Parliament of Morioh approves a $121 million bill on the new renovation and expansion of the legislative branch, while also cutting the number of house members and senators by two thirds. The new parliament will have new office rooms in the building, but the two chambers took the sacrifice to be smaller to make room. It will also have a new extension to house all members of the parliament, built underneath the plaza.

Parliment of Morioh

The Parliament of Morioh under renovation and expansion.

"It is a wonderful thing to be happening in Morioh," said the Speaker of the House, Ryan Ryan. "Us members of the parliament have always been working far from the parliament, and many of us don't even have an actual office, so this new addition to the parliament is amazing. The constituents will also be able to visit us in a public place behind closed doors."

Many others have criticized the move, saying how downsizing the number of voting members gives the people less power. "What we need is a direct democracy with as many people as possible!" said a citizen protesting at the construction site. "To hell with this laughable extension, why not have an assembly at the Opera House? That could house all of the population easily!"

During the construction period of the parliament, which is estimated to be around 2 to 4 days, the House of Representatives will convene at the Opera House, while the Senate will go to the newly built Richmond Young Hall at University of Morioh's Department of the Arts. The two chambers are available for the public to be gathered in the boxes.

Written by: NerdieSanders

Morioh finally finishes

[July 23rd, 2018] After over a year of construction, the city of Morioh has finally finished, after the completion of the university earlier today. There will be an opening ceremony later today filled with military tanks brought by the president of Canabai, NerdieSanders. Upon finishing Morioh, the 2nd mayor of the city, AlphaSkyRaider, gives ownership back to the 1st mayor, Del, despite the latter being pretty silent the past few months. Note that Morioh will continue to be improved as the future rolls on, such as completion of the subway and new government buildings, but it should be considered largely finished. The former mayor of Morioh, AlphaSkyRaider, now seeks to help other people on the server with their builds as well as making his own city called Fegelein.

Written by: Delphox

New Restaurants open in Canabai City Centre serving "constantly annoyed food"

[Canabai City, Canabai, Jul 24] Residents lined up outside 3 new restaurants that opened Tuesday in Canabai City. Each restaurant served their own version of "constantly annoyed food" on their menu.

"The constantly annoyed banh mi was fairly interesting, the meat had a very gamey taste, but it was very well balanced with the daikon and carrots in the sandwich," resident Sam Jarovy told The Records regarding the Constantly Annoyed Banh Mi Shop. "I would definitely have it again."

"The constantly annoyed phở had everything I'm looking for in a good phở," Ian Truong told The Records. "It has a good base, the meat is plentiful, the bean sprouts and herbs were very fresh, and overall Constantly Annoyed Phở probably has the best bowl of phở I've had."

Tony Whatever talked to The Records after eating at Constantly Annoyed Kebab. "It was a very good kebab, and those that keep saying to remove kebab should come here and have one. The bread, meat, sauce, and other sides make the whole thing a very interesting combo. This beats any sandwich at McDonald's."

Lines stretched across several blocks, causing several traffic disruptions throughout the day.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Canabai govt. creates Canabai National Railways and took control of Southwest Railways

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Jul 25] The Department of Transportation created the Canabai National Railways with the intent of taking control of most railways within the country and create even more connections in between cities and towns.

"Taking control of the Southwest Railways enables us to maintain the rail lines that are poorly maintained while still having a lot of riders. Seeing as most of these riders are citizens of our nation, there is a sense of ownership that we're already have. Taking control is the crucial and necessary step," said the Minister of Transportation, Keiran Henderson. "We are also seeking to further connect Canabai City and Levanski. With climate change looming at the horizon, and seeing how going from Canabai City to Levanski requires a personal car, we feel like there is a need for us to create commuter lines in between the towns and cities in Canabai," the minister added.

Written by: NerdieSanders

Zion improves relationships with Fegelein

[Fegelein, Jul 26] After some heated drama and arguments, Neo and Delphox, mayor of Fegelein, a new relation was established after the two cities, which are completely different from each other, decided to accept their differences even if the taste is very different.

Zion suggests other cities doing the same thing.

Written by: Neo

Dept. of Transportation: Southwest Railway Renovation near completion

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Jul 28] Minister of Transportation, Keiran Henderson announced at a press conference that the Southwest Railway Renovation Project is nearly completion. The Aquileia Line connecting Altholz and Orpiment is restored; the Altholz Line is almost finished, with only the section between Altholz and Levanski to be finished; and Orpiment Line is next on the priority list.

"We are certainly very optimistic that this new renovation will bring in greater ridership on us and increase connection between the East and West Canabai. For the first time after 3 years, the two parts of the country is finally connected," said Henderson at the press conference.

Written by: NerdieSanders

Man changes gender on government-issued IDs to get cheaper car insurance

[LITTLE SAIGON, Canabai, Jul 29] He wanted a brand new car — a Chevrolet Cruze with all the trimmings.

As a man in his early 20s, he knew his insurance costs would be high.

So he became a woman, though only on paper.

"I have taken advantage of a loophole," said the man — we're calling him John — who spoke on the condition that his identity be kept confidential because of the potential repercussions.

John, who lives in Little Saigon, says he identifies as a male. But his government-issued identification tells a different story.

It started when an insurance company gave John a quote — roughly $22,000 a year, if he bought the Chevy. He had a collision and a ticket or two on his record, which helped boost the premium.

Then, he had an idea. He asked the insurer what his costs would be if he were a woman. He was told his annual bill would sink to roughly $500 — a $21,500 difference.

"I was pretty angry about that. And I didn't feel like getting screwed over any more," he said.

"So I asked them to change my gender on my auto policy, and she's like, we can't do that." According to the Insurance Bureau of Canabai, men under 25 are generally at higher risk of collision than women of the same age, which means their premiums are often higher.

John, who was 23 at the time, says he learned he first had to change his gender on his birth certificate and driver's license before he could have it reflected on his insurance policy, to get the cheaper rate.

After doing some research, he realized he needed a doctor's note to show the government he identifies as a woman, even though he doesn't.

"It was pretty simple," he said. "I just basically asked for it and told them that I identify as a woman, or I'd like to identify as a woman, and he wrote me the letter I wanted."

In June, the Canabai government scrapped the doctor's note requirement for adults after lobbyists from Rainbow Bloc forced them, allowing them to declare their marker as M, F or X, for those who don't fit into a strictly male or female binary.

John shipped the note and other paperwork off to the provincial government. And, a few weeks later, he received a new birth certificate in the mail indicating he was a woman.

"I was quite shocked, but I was also relieved," he said. "I felt like I beat the system. I felt like I won."

With the new birth certificate in hand, he changed his driver's licence and insurance policy.

"I'm a man, 100 per cent. Legally, I'm a woman," he said.

"I did it for cheaper car insurance."

David says he's aware the methods he used to become a woman on paper are designed for Albertans who need to correct the gender marker on their identification to reflect who they really are. But he says his target was the insurance industry, not the gender diverse community.

"I didn't do it to point out how easy it is to change genders," he said. "I didn't do it to criticize or ridicule transgender or LGBT rights."

Written by: NerdieSanders

Source: Alberta man changes gender on government IDs for cheaper car insurance

Dorklich to relieve visa application requirements for Canabai

[Dorklich Mayor's Press Gallery, July 30th, 2018] After several days of consideration, the Mayor of Dorklich, KrebsLovesFiesh, has changed the requirements for visa application for all citizens of Canabai. Instead of having to use the whole shmack to apply, applicants can now use their passports (which has been in the holder's possession for at least 60 days) to apply. No further documents are needed. Although any citizens of Canabai abusing this change will be prosecuted under Canabai law.

Currently the mayor is working on negotiating with the president of Canabai to let Dorklich enter it's country more easily.

Written by: KrebsLovesFiesh


Canabai City Coffee Shop sued for serving cleaning solution

[Canabai City, Canabai, Aug 1] A customer is suing the Canabai City Coffee Shop for damages after she ordered a latte, only to drink it and find that it was actually some sort of cleaning solution. Canabai City Coffee Shop alleges no responsibility for the incident, saying that the latte machine was in the process of being cleaned before the customer ordered, and an employee forgot to disconnect the cleaning solution before preparing the customer's drink.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Source: Pregnant mom served cleaning solution instead of latte at southern Alberta McDonald's

Solaris halts construction

[Solaris, Aug 1] Solaris Leader QuestionTuesdayFTW issued a stop order for all construction in Solaris today, pending multiple approvals from the UMS council for transportation from Solaris to other cities in the server. Many residents denounced the move, as it was also announced immediately before QuestionTuesdayFTW's vacation, saying that construction of Solaris, at the rate it was going, would never finish. STB Leader Ugultu even accused QuestionTuesdayFTW of using the move as an excuse to play more Warframe.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Man charged after erratic, naked driving spree in Canabai

[Levanski, Aug 1] A man was charged today by Canabai Police for erratically driving on Highway 01 during evening rush hour while naked. The man faces numerous charges, including Dangerous Driving, Theft over $5,000, and Indecency after he stole a Canabai Mail Truck, put up a Rainbow Bloc Party banner on said truck, and proceeded to hit multiple cars in the Levanski-bound lanes, before running into a convenience store on the outskirts of Levanski where he was arrested.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Source: Canada Post employee charged in erratic, naked driving spree in Calgary

Krebs Fish and Maps Company employee fired after caught splashing pedestrians in Morioh

[Morioh, Aug 1] A Krebs Fish and Maps Company employee was fired after video surfaced of one of its trucks intentionally running into puddles after a large rain in Morioh in order to splash pedestrians. The company issued a statement saying "that we are very disappointed with the [truck driver's] actions and we apologize to anyone impacted by this incident. The driver is no longer employed with us."

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Source: Van driver fired after being caught splashing pedestrians

Dorklich tourist shot in head near Altholz

[Altholz, Aug 4] A man has been arrested and his vehicle was seized by Canabai National Police after a Dorklich tourist was shot in the head while driving his family to Terra Aquileia National Park Saturday.

"We had a 59 year old individual who was travelling in a Toyota Sienna with his wife and kids inside, when another car passed them on Highway 12, lowering their passenger side window in the process, before a firearm was produced and discharged," Sgt. Brandon Duppstepp told the National Records.

The driver lost control of the vehicle, running numerous cars off the road before crashing into a tree. No injuries, apart from the driver, were reported. The driver was airlifted to Levanski General Hospital where a successful surgery was performed. The driver is expected to recover from his injuries, while his family are quite shocked and traumatized by the incident.

Originally being investigated as an incident of road rage, officers later confirmed it to be a case of mistaken identity, as "none of the occupants of the Sienna were the intended targets of the shooting." No charges have been laid.

Following the shooting, Dorklich Foreign Affairs upgraded the travel risk for Canabai to Extreme, saying "that Dorklich residents are being unfairly treated while in Canabai, as they get targeted during shootings while in Canabai. It is rumoured that in the wake of this isolated incident, Dorklich attempted to close the embassy in Canabai again.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Source: Arrest made after German tourist shot in head near Calgary

RAIL CRISIS!!! Far West Express Line is blocked!!!

[Strasburger & Eston Post, Aug 4th] A train Ex 58741 from Dorklich Central to Los Vipleros with over 150 passengers dissapeared. According to testimony of Alexander Maus, a traffic officer from Heeree, the train disappeared after passing 500 blocks after leaving the station. No contact with Ottoburg station was even received, as communication attempts via radio or telephone ended in failure. Traffic officer from Strasburger, Mike Testack, made 7 failed attempts to contact the Ottoburg and missing train crew.

Director of RRC Central, KrebsLovesFiesh, and CEO of RRC, ParrotAntics, decided to estabilish a crisis board and they contacted SRA leadership to solve the problem of "missing station". They also plan an intervention at operators' board to solve the problem, possibly rerouting the line and making a new station to stay away from faulty chunk area, which size is barely measurable.

Marius Max Kolonko, I say how it is.

Written by: ParrotAntics

Lost FWE train station found and the line is refurbished!!!

[Sanostonburg, Aug 5th] After long hours of calling and searching, traffic officer received a message: "Here's Ottoburg! We're finally back with communication!!!" Cheers in RRC and SRA were meant to be neverending. The station itself was temporarily removed from it's location in order to save it from chunk error.

Also, the Ex 58741 train was also found, as it stopped at the station right after loss of communication. All passengers are not injured and they received appropriate refunds.

During search, the FWE line needed to be rerouted, as climbing passage was replaced with tunnel from the eastern side of Ottoburg station. As RRC East Director, KrebsLovesFiesh, said: "This will serve better with shorter time periods of arrival from Dorklich to Ottoburg."

Also, the working groups of RRC and SRA announced the completion of FWE refurbishment on the Dorklich - Clarksonville and Heerree - Ottoburg sections. Both sections were electrified, and trackground was replaced with gravel, thus causing bridges and viaducts to be strengthened. Also most of the tunnels on the first sections were renewed with concrete. Now the tunnels between Ottoburg and Garfield and first Dorklich tunnel await the refurbishment.

Marius Max Kolonko, I say how it is.

Written by: ParrotAntics

Weston station to be upgraded to high-capacity station

[WESTON, Canabai, Aug 5] After years of overloading, Canabai National Railways decided to upgrade its station, connecting RTN Templer Line, CTS Little Saigon Line, and the future CNR Peridot Line, says Minister of Transportation, Keiran Henderson.

"It's actually very convenient, since we're also upgrading the Peridot Line, we also thought of upgrading Weston station too because there's going to be a large amount of people going from Levanski and Altholz to the Canabai City area, and vice versa. With the new addition to the Koyama hill as a tourist attraction in Weston, the forecast all points to greater capacity load to the station."

During question time, Henderson also pointed out that the designated color of Peridot Line would be lime green, and Aquileia Line would be light blue.

Written by: NerdieSanders

Zion Leader Neo ousted from server

[Zion, Aug 5] Judges charged Zion Leader Neo with the death penalty for his crimes committed throughout the past month.

"Zion and its leader Neo have made server relations with any city or country very toxic. He was so obsessed with exposing the flaw in everybody that it was impossible to have even a conversation over the phone without interjection," STB Leader Ugultu commented after the ruling.

"I was the only one who supported Neo and Zion in general, but even I have to agree that he went way too far in exposing the flaw. I am very happy that the UMS Court charged him. The railway claim drama, the flying saucer drama, it was too much," read a statement from QuestionTuesdayFTW's office in Solaris.

"This is much worse than tudor's attempts to claim the entire server, the way he tried to expose the flaw in everybody made me think that he was planning uprisings and eventual overthrowing's of all the leaders in the server," Fegelein Leader AlphaSkyRaider told the Records.

"This should have been done a very long time ago. I'm all for new development in the server, but Zion was just way too aggressive in all regards," Canabai Leader NerdieSanders commented outside the courtroom.

It is expected that the UMS Council will be meeting sometime tomorrow to discuss how Zion will be divided up between the different leaders in the wake of this judgement.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Man found in cafe freezer attacks, then dies

[STB, Aug 6] A 39 year old Zion man died after jumping out a freezer and attacking an employee with a kitchen knife on Monday at a popular restaurant.

The man shouted, "For Zion!" and grabbed the knife after an employee opened the walk-in freezer at Chorum Kebab. Workers came and wrestled the man to the floor, taking away the knife in the process, after the commotion around 11 a.m., police say. During the struggle, the man lost consciousness and went into cardiac arrest. He was taken to STB General Hospital where he was pronounced dead. Nobody else was injured.

"Based on the number of emergency vehicles outside the restaurant, one could mistake the incident for an overreaction to a choking incident," told an STB resident who lives across the street from the restaurant.

Police did not release the name of the man, but did comment that he was one of the many Zion residents who fled the city in the wake of Zion Leader Neo's sentencing and subsequent dissolution of the Zion government. Like many other Zion residents, he appeared to have been brainwashed by the Zion government. The restaurant is expected to be closed until Wednesday until investigators determine how the man got into the freezer, and how long he had been in there.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Source: Man Found in Cafe Freezer Attacks Worker, Then Dies, Police Say

Zion military strikes back into Fegelein

Zion Military 1

The Zion Military attacks Fegelein.

[FEGELDORF, Fegelein, Aug 7th] As said on title, Zion's remaining military power has attacked to Fegelein recently, using their kamikaze brony planes.

Zion Military 2

Fegelein was attacked by the Zion Miltary with horses.

Other people from different cities has reported they have seen Zion kamikaze brony planes too.

"When I saw it, I couldn't believe my eyes!" said Johny Johnston, from Canabai.

Eyewitness video of the attack.

Written by: Ugultu

Dept. Of Transport: Canabai finished upgrading both rails and roads in Sport Complex corridor

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Aug 10] Keiran Henderson, Minister of Transportation, said in a press conference today that Canabai has finished upgrading Highway 1, 4, and RTN Templer Line and CTS Canabai Metro. "What we have done with regards to rails is that we added a shorter and faster route in both lines. Riders from Weston to Canabai Central especially will feel a significantly shorter ride time. And as for the roads, we connected Highway 4 from Little Saigon to Canabai City with building Smyzcek Tunnel and Rosenstein Bridge; and on Highway 1, we've upgraded the Devin Nunes bridge by fixing the width at certain segments, improving supports by adding embankments, and removing redundant supports for the River Race."

These upgrades came after pressure from the Labour Party calling for greater connection within the before-lacking infrastructure in the Sport Complex corridor, and especially in between Little Saigon and Canabai; and polls are showing that the party is currently on the rise.

Written by: NerdieSanders

Airport operations disrupted across server as airspace is shut down due to stolen plane incident

[Unterganger City, Aug 11] The UMS Aviation Agency ordered the entire airspace of the UMS shut down as Canabai National Forces sent army planes to intercept a stolen plane originating from Canabai International Airport early Saturday morning.

"We had an estranged baggage handler from Fegel Air storm out onto the tarmac, and board a Q400 series plane for Fegel Air," Canabai Airport Authority representative Tony Whatever told the National Records. "An unauthorized take off was made at around 3:22 local time, and the plane cut off numerous flights attempting to take off and land at Canabai International. It is a miracle that no collisions were reported."

"We received word about the stolen plane at about 3:30 Canabai time, and immediately ordered the closure of all Canabai airspace. Once Canabai Air Traffic Control reported that the plane was leaving the Canabai radar area, we ordered the closure and ground stop of all flights across the UMS," UMSAA representative Raymond Yang told the Records. "Canabai Army Planes were immediately sent out to intercept the plane."

Throughout the entire ordeal, ATC towers throughout the server maintained contact with the plane, attempting to encourage the pilot to land. It is reported that the pilot described himself to ATC controllers as "a man in crisis, a broken man with a few screws loose." He also claimed that he did not want to harm anyone, but wanted ATC controllers to "whisper sweet nothings into [his] ear."

The plane was seen doing many unsafe maneuvers in the process, including a series of barrel rolls over Morioh. The plane eventually crashed 2.5 hours later when it ran out of fuel, crashing just outside Lakecastle. The pilot was killed and the aircraft was destroyed, but no other fatalities were reported.

UMS Airspace remains closed to all passenger air traffic while investigators work to find out details about the incident, causing numerous cancellations and many angry travellers. UMSAA reported that they hope to reopen server airspace by 00:00 Sunday morning.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Source: Aircraft crashes after 'stolen' plane takes off from Seattle Tacoma International Airport

RRC Rails to operate more frequent journeys between all long-haul routes

[RRC HQ, August 12th] After hearing the news that international airspace has been locked down, RRC founder, KrebsLovesFiesh, has decided to put more trains into service to shuttle the increasing amount of passengers travelling by rail. Although domestic air travel within Dorklich (by means of elytra) is legal because the airspace is under Dorklich's authority.

Written by: KrebsLovesFiesh

LV - CAN rail link? Herzlich willkommen!

[Los Vipleros, Aug 12th] President of San Escobar, Leoncio Almeida, declared readiness of Los Vipleros to maintain a railway link between San Escobar and Canabai, officialy announcing end of expanding the railway station that already serves RRC Far West Express line. He also stated that government waits for response of Canabai government.

Written by: ParrotAntics

Counsellors: Get rid of this monstrosity!

[Tarrantia, Aug 12th] At XXXVII extraordinary session, which was closed yesterday, Tarrantia City Council unaimously supported Deputy Mayor's proposal to call Redstone Railway Company to demolish "floating path" of Forklich Main Line over Tarrantia's skyline and move it in underground tunnel, that has been built today. Deputy Mayor called the path "notorious obstruction to construction of Southern Housing District". "We cannot longer tolerate this monstrosity. I want the bright future to the city, that's why I voted for demolishing it." - said Mrs. Maria Romanek, a counselor and chief of "Millionaire Society" in Tarrantia.

Up to this moment RRC East have not issued any response to Council's demands.

Mariusz Max Kolonko, I say how it is!

Written by: ParrotAntics

Dorklich Leader KrebsLovesFiesh resigns after genital paraphernalia of Leader emerges on internet

[Dorklich, Aug 12] Dorklich Leader KrebsLovesFiesh resigned in an unprecedented move Sunday, after genital paraphernalia of Krebs emerged on the internet.

"Immediately following this revelation, my office got an influx of mail, as did my social media, with the majority of comments accusing me of being involved in pornography. I deny all accusations that I am involved in the distribution and/or creation of pornography. For the sake of my public image, I immediately resign as Leader of Dorklich," read a statement from the Leader's office.

ParrotAntics has been appointed as interim leader of Dorklich until the next election. Laval leader Gaker was taken into custody by UMS Special Forces on suspicion of releasing and distributing pornography, as well as release of material for the purpose of degrading a political leader.

This is yet another blow to the Dorklich government in recent weeks prior to the start of the next election campaign, after Leader Krebs was impeached by the Court of UMS for a week in the wake of the Railway Claim Drama. Dorklich has also been struggling with an influx of immigrants with Zion residents fleeing Zion after Leader Neo was charged with the death penalty for his crimes, and other cities in the server announced that they would not take in any immigrants.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

PM Nerdie Sanders: Expand commercial zoning into the South Mazes of the National Mall

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Aug 12] PM Nerdie Sanders (LS) from National Coalition suggested the City to remove its largest green space at one of the party's rally at Canabai Stadium, while his crowd gave him a loud disapproval.

"Look, if we are all complaining about rising costs of living, then how about new space? I mean, just look at the map and where do you see some space we can build? Right there, the National Mall! We all have enough green space, and if we want to go to the park, just drive to Altholz and we'll have one," the PM said to a booing crowd.

Many other National Coalition candidates are also advocating using cities' green space to expand downtowns. After the rallies, many goers were seen to head towards the Labour or the Greens' rallies, in hope for an answer to preserve those green space.

"We will never remove our precious green space in our cities!" exclaimed Social Democrat leader, Sam Jarovy (LE-DO). "I love Levanski and never would I swear to remove the existing and lovely Triangle right next to our downtown. It is the green lung that all of us can enjoy and breathe in the dense and populated city." The crowd cheered to his speech. "If anything, our green spaces must stay away from the greedy Coalts' hands. National Coalition must be voted out of the parliament!"

After what was dubbed the "Green Overture" by most of the Internet, polls are showing that the National Coalition Party is taking a huge dive, especially in Kovansberg where the Soc Dems are showing signs of gaining momentum, whereas in Levanski, both Soc Dems and Greens are riding on a huge green wave, dominating the political landscape in the West. The liberals are also seeming to ride the popularity in Levanski after their new declaration of integrating the Canabai market to Athyras and Port Random market.

Written by: NerdieSanders

UMS attacked by terrorists

[Unterganger City, Aug 13] Much of the UMS was silent Monday after terrorists attacked multiple population centres throughout the server, causing an estimated 5000 casualties, 7000 non-fatal injuries, and crippling numerous services throughout the server.

The majority of the causalities came from RT Central and the TP hub, both of which were flooded with lava at 8:17 am, right in the middle of rush hour. It was especially tragic in the TP hub as many people would enter their local teleport booth, only to arrive and land straight into lava. RT Services to RT Central were shut down at 8:24 am, with all RT Services suspended at 8:39 am. All Teleport hubs were not ordered shut down until 9:02 am due to the lack of correspondence at the TP hub.

Mabula was also attacked indirectly by lava flowing down from the TP Hub. Although causalities and injuries were minimal due to the lava flowing down into Mabula outskirts. a Mabula resident is being hailed as a hero for running to Unterganger City to let the UMS Council know about the TP Hub situation.

The City of Fegelein was attacked the most heavily, with lava flooding the streets and overtaking many unsuspecting residents. Numerous buildings were burnt to the ground in the process.

"This incident is truly worse than 9/11, but thankfully while the terrorists were flooding Fegelein with lava, UMS Special Forces were able to jump in and kill the perpetrators," UMS Council Representative Sam Jarovy told the National Records.

RT Central services as well as UMS Airspace remain suspended and shut down, as is the TP hub, Many public buildings are also closed throughout the server as both cleanup and investigation continue.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Inspired by: Black August 13 Raids

Fragmented transit frustrate commuters

[NEWPORT, Canabai, Aug 14] Commuters were found unhappy with the fragmented rail transit systems run by close to half a dozen operators, according to survey conducted by the Canabai University's School of Transportation.

From 420 commuting correspondents, it was found that 40% were unhappy with the lack of integration between operators, while 27% cited having to walk between station buildings to change lines. 35% feel that the rail lines insufficiently connect between major urban centers and conversely 42% found concurrency between two or more lines running close together confusing. 12% of commuters found the numerous short lines defeat the purpose of mass transport. Of note is that the majority of the elderly and the nauseous actively avoid certain lines due to poor geometry of the lines.

When asked on actions they want to see taken by authorities, 26% recommended the extension of existing lines to cover new areas. 21% wanted consolidation of short lines into a longer line to eliminate frequent interchanges. 17% wanted the differing operators to provide more interchange stations. 11% would like to see more lines from different operators physically join their tracks to allow through services. 8% called for the merger of operators in order to streamline services throughout the UMS.

The survey sampled a representative of the commuting population in terms of gender, age, and income.

Written by: Kimilil

Canabai Parliament responds to August 13 attack with terrorist group labeling, many parties introduce border policies and foreign aid ahead of election

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Aug 13] The Parliament approves the bill of labelling ISIZ, or Insane State of Zion, as an extreme terrorist group after the August 13 attack which caused major damages and thousands of deaths in Unterganger City, Teleporter Hub, and Fegelein. Most casualties were commuters, tourists at DA's Castle, and residents in Fegelein.

"August 13, a day which will live in infamy, the server was attacked by two extremists from the Insane State of Zion from the rubbles of former Zion. Thousands and thousands of deaths, including many Canabaian tourists going through the teleporter hub, were recorded to an astounding number never seen before in the history of the world. Today, we will label the ISIZ as a terrorist group," announced PM Nerdie Sanders at the podium in front of the Parliament, facing the Square.

"We are very lucky to not get attacked by the ISIZ. A public inquiry has conducted an investigation and the head of the investigation has reported that thanks to the disorientation of Canaport that these terrorists weren't able to find their way out," the PM said. After the attack, many parties used the terrorists as a way to increase their support ahead of the election. For proponents of borders, National Coalition said they would strengthen the borders of Canabai, whereas Canabai Front wanted to close the borders completely and cancel all immigrant processes. The Communists also wanted to increase border control.

Social Democrats said they will provide aid to rebuild whatever that is attacked, that the internal police should be increased, and the border shall remain open for business conducted with Athyras. The Liberals also agreed to leave the borders open, but that the market should be "freerer." The Greens, Pirate Party, and Rainbow Bloc provided no answer, but they said that they are welcomed to providing aid for the attacked.

Written by: NerdieSanders

A 14-year-old is running for Altholz councillor before he can even vote

[ALTHOLZ, Canabai, Aug 14] Oliver Johnson, who is 14 years old, stood at the podium in front of Altholz Station. "We will continue the greatness of the green space that we are having here. We will continue to strive for the greenest, and cleanest town in the entire nation of Canabai!" exclaimed Johnson to a cheering crowd.

2 months ago, Oliver Johnson was sitting in the gallery of the council chamber, watching the politicians passing a repeal of an anti-deforestation bill to make way for more farms. After the mayor announced that the bill is passed, he stormed out of the city hall and cried in his room.

"I was hopeless," remembered Johnson. "I used to play in the forests with joy and then, it felt like my childhood was gone."

He then looked up the age requirement of running for councillor. There was none. And so he decided to file in a candidate form and 2 days after that, he was approved to run.

"I was astonished," he said. "I had to quickly gather my debate friends and explained to them what just happened. They were all on board with my cause and I made them the staff of the campaign."

So far, he's been doing very well. The Green Party were at first surprised at the youngster, but after reading his manifesto, the party accepted him and soon gave him the materials for running. His fellow candidates were also very excited of this new young addition.

"To be truthful with you, I am glad that we still have the young people who are very enthusiastic for politics," Mike Bauer, Johnson's fellow Green MP candidate, said. "You see this young man here, he'll be Deputy PM 10 years from now."

Many doubts his maturity to run for office, however Johnson still thinks he'll win the seat. "Many still judge the number that they see, but they never hear what I can offer to them. I know most of them are wrong, but please, everyone should have their first chance of doing something."

Written by: NerdieSanders

Source: 14-year-old boy uses legal quirk to run for Vermont governor

Construction lull concerns contractors

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, 14 August] Following the moratorium on construction works following 13 August's server-wide terrorist attacks, contractors and other construction industry players voices their concern on the impact of the moratorium on the economy.

The Builders League, United, UMS Chapter's Spokesperson, Engi, told reporters that the server-wide stop work order derailed work programs, put general workers and tradesmen without work, and generally have a chain effect on the suppliers as well as the construction industry as a whole. While he understands that checks are being done on the workers to screen potential malicious actors, it also scares away some workers, and employers are finding themselves mysteriously short of a few man here and there.

He urges the authorities to lift the order as soon as possible so that workers can resume their trade and earn their wages, planners can adjust their work programmes without significant ripple effects, and ease the concerns of other stakeholders in the industry. At the same time, he is offering the services of his sentries to help with security to expedite the ongoing investigations.

Engi is a representative of the Builders League, United, a trade union of construction companies across the UMS, with a local chapter established here soon after the server opening.

Written by: Kimilil

UMS Airspace remains shut down

[Canabai City, Canabai. Aug 14] UMS Airspace remains shut down as airports enter their 4th day of shutdown, as yet another plane related incident further delays the reopening of UMS Airspace to non-military air traffic.

An unauthorized take off was made at Canabai International Airport early Monday night at 11:30 pm, while Airspace was still shut down. Air traffic controllers ordered the pilot of the Cessna 525 to come back down or face a shootdown by a military plane, but the pilot did not comply. Instead, he charted his plane towards Levanski, and circled around a residential area for an hour. When military planes came to order the pilot back to Canabai International, he took a very steep dive, crashing into a house in a fiery explosion, nearly hitting power lines and other houses in the process.

Preliminary investigation by Levanski Police and Canabai National Police shows that the pilot intentionally hit his own house after a domestic dispute with his wife over their marriage, which resulted in his arrest at a local park for assault. Angry by the outcome, he intended to crash his plane into his own house, killing his wife and child, while also showing off by taking off during the ground stop of all planes. The crash only lead to the death of the pilot.

This is the third such incident that has left the UMS Airspace closed in recent days, after a plane was stolen from Canabai International on Saturday, as well as the terrorist attacks that happened yesterday throughout the server.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Source: Man flies plane into Utah home after fight with wife

BREAKING: The National Records office set on fire by arson, graffitied

[Morioh, Aug 14] The National Records office was set on fire early Tuesday afternoon, with the fire being suspected to be an arson by ISIZ. The following was seen on the side of the building suggesting that it was ISIZ.

This is a message to all viewers on the Unterganger Minecraft Server.

This article has been censored by the Zion Union for the heavy promotion and constant diffusion of corruption, Ill democracy, favoritism and the flaw.

After a lack of diplomacy and collaboration by the two arguing parties, any diplomatic act has been suspended by Zion has been suspended until further notice.

Zion has given up on any attempt on democracy.

Blessed be our founding Father and Zion, a nation reborn.

May the star be with you all.

Message from Neo: as you can see, dear players, I changed, I changed to your standards, since you have already changed, I changed to what you really are.

Here is a little update on the flawed players, and their offenses:

- Ugultu, Founder OF Sanostonburg (offenses: Corruption, harassment, favoritism)

- AlphaSkyRaider: Founder OF Fegelein (offenses: harassment)

- NerdieSanders: Mayor of Canabai and its districts (offenses: Corruption, power abuse, harassment and general incapability to solve any issue diplomatically)

- QuestionTuesdayFTW: Founder of Solaris (offenses: Corruption, treason, favoritism)

- WQ_Josh: (offenses: harassment)

- KrebsLovesFiesh: Mayor OF Dorklich (offenses: harassment)

- Neo: Founding Father Of Zion (offenses: not being able to just act like Socrates)

If you think I indeed am wicked, please dig deeper and figure out why I am first.

Have a splendid day


More details to come.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Solaris shuts down most diplomatic relations in wake of rise of ISIZ

[Solaris, Aug 14] Solaris leader QuestionTuesdayFTW announced the severing of most diplomatic relations between numerous countries and cities across the UMS in the wake of numerous ISIZ attacks, as well as numerous death threats from former Zion leader Neo.

"I have literally cut my vacation short to address you all here today. With the rise of ISIZ attacking numerous areas of the UMS, including the TP Hub, Fegelein, and The National Records office, I hereby announce that Solaris will no longer engage in foreign relations with any city or country in the UMS, with the very notable exception of Canabai. I had a lot of respect for the former leader of Zion, but I have been receiving numerous death threats from him in recent days for being the ultimate decider in the guilty ruling for his crimes. I am very supportive of many concepts of towns throughout the UMS, but the entire purpose of Zion revolved way too much around one idea. It was only there to "diffuse the Flaw,"" QuestionTuesdayFTW told a crowd before having to stop, visibly frustrated.

"He has gone to the point where he wanted the UMS Council dissolved, he wanted leaders impeached and sentenced with the death penalty, he has wanted to destroy towns just for being against Zion. I have lost all due respect for Neo and for Zion, and I am cutting all ties with all countries and cities so that Solaris can go back and establish a better way to go about our foreign relations. Previously, before the sentencing, Solaris was a leader in foreign relations, creating numerous deals with other countries. We were the leader of the movement to support Zion, as many cities and countries then were very much against Zion, and close to sending in invasion forces. At one point, Zion/Solaris foreign relations were of the strongest in the server. In the wake of these death threats and degradation of myself, Solaris, as well as other cities, countries, and leaders in the server, Solaris has decided to cut all foreign relations in order to reevaluate future strategy when it comes to dealing with other countries."

QuestionTuesdayFTW was unavailable for comment immediately following the announcement.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

Anti-Zion sentiment rampant in Laval

[Voltaire, Laval, August 14th] In Laval, known for having a high amount of roads for a city that's small, now is also known for it's anti-Zion sentiment, a Renault Midlum, belonging to a ultranationalist organization used it's loudspeakers to encourage attacks on Zionians and their property, so that "they can pay for their atrocities and their loyalty to a terrorist." Anti-Zion riots are raging across the "Vieux Iles Region," with any person known to be a Zionian beaten up to injury. The prime minister of Laval, Jean Villard has issued an travel ban to Zion, any Lavalloise found to be a visitor of Laval are to be refused entry and subject to imprisonment and interrogation, with approval from the president, Guillame Louche (Gaker73).

Written by: Gaker73

Canabai Library and Archive building and Prime Residences on fire set by ISIZ, many casualties recorded

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Aug 14] Another turn of events came for the August 14 raid attacks when ISIZ targeted the CLA in Little Saigon and PM Nerdie Sander's residences in Canabai City. Thirty-two people perished in the fires, mostly students of young age and PM's staffers in the Residence. The police reported that foreign perpetrators were arrested 2 hours after the fire in Palace Station where they were hiding.

"This is an outrageous act of terrorism, being brought on by the State of Zion," announced Prime Minister Nerdie Sanders, who is thankfully unhurt because he was in Levanski. "I declare closing the border until the upcoming elections for the sake of our national security. This is only temporary and I leave the new government to resolve the issue of our security. The following statement, however, does not necessarily reflect the party nor the government's opinion, but rather mine: Canabai is breached."

"I am deeply hurtful of the attack, and certainly will always. Many people I have regularly talked to while working in the Residences have withered under these extremists spreading hateful ideology. You cannot imagine losing your co-workers when they're doing their job, and while you're away governing this country under pressure. It's heart breaking."

Developing story, more to come.

Written by: NerdieSanders

Laval conducts strikes on ISIZ

[Laval City, Laval, Aug 14] The MoD of Laval announced that Laval will be conducting strikes on ISIZ militants, saying that "they deserve to pay for what they did." The Lavallois armed forces are heading to places where ISIZ is suspected to be, with Rafales, A-10s and B-2 respectively missiling, strafing and bombarding the militants, the navy followed suit, launching missiles at the militants, later, the ground forces cleansed the location of militant presence.

Written by: Gaker73

Lavallois ultranationalists strikes back after ISIZ attack

[Laval City, Laval, Aug 15 (North American Eastern Time)] The Midlum sound truck has returned with ultranationalists holding signs and flags of Laval, slowing the traffic of Autoroute 10 near Route 220, the Midlum used it's loudspeakers to announce the following message:

"For the people of Laval, we have news to announce, a Zionian rammed his Mercedes into your people and stabbed a few more, while we pay condolences to the Lavallois victims, we also like to present you with a solution to this fuck-up, we shall punish the Zionians with death, find a Zionian, send them to us where we'll beat them up and shoot them, dispose their bodies like garbage. This solution is the only solution to prevent more of their terrorist attacks from happening."

Riots ensued again, ultranationalists continue to look for Zionians and their failed attempts to lynch them, but has also met counter-protests, far-left organizations used pepper spray, spilled urine on their enemies, et cetera. However, for the failure to intervene in the attacks, the Ministry of Law Enforcement has faced criticism and with president Louche (Gaker73) condemning the attacks and the ensuing riots.

However, despite criticism for the failure to intervene, the Ministry of Law Enforcement did promise the Gendarmerie to patrol sites and intervene in any future riots, Gendarmes are now a sight across Lavallois streets.

To explain what caused the chain-reaction of these riots, an pro-Neo Zionian rammed his Mercedes G55 into a university, injuring and killing some people, then stabbed three people when the Mercedes failed to move.

Written by: Gaker73

Enforcing Tarrantia

[Tarrantia, Aug 15th] Since August 13th sir Duraab, Major of Tarrantia, stepped off from any agreements with Zion and ordered increasing amount of street patrols, thus announcing the city as NGZZ - "No-Go Zone for Zionians". On both railway stations ID and custom controls has been introduced for arrival and departure. All existing roads leading outside Tarrantia were blocked with police vehicles and CT squad groups.

Leftist opposite party treats these actions as an act of "zionophobia" and racism, and they want to obstruct today's holiday with anti-mayor protests.

Mariusz Max Kolonko, I say how it is.

Written by: ParrotAntics

RRC gets a new station

[Dorklich, Aug 18th] Redstone Railway Company Eastern Division and Sanostonburg Railway Authority jointly announced completion of newly built terminal station at Dinnertime district of Dorklich, that will support existing Dorklich Central station.

The station was built in a style of late XIX - early XX century production plant (or Victorian style). It will serve over 10 pairs of tracks. 2 track chambers are dedicated for 4-track railway line between new station and existing railway infrastructure in Dorklich.

RRC denied that functioning of new station will make Lucek Memorial Line and Far West Express Line obstruct. During construction the existing Dinnertime station building for LML was left untouched.

Mariusz Max Kolonko, I say how it is.

Written by: ParrotAntics

The coronation of Guilliame Louche (Gaker73)

[Laval City, Laval, August 18] Laval converts from being a parliamentary republic to a parliamentary monarchy as Louche was bestowed with a crown, the ceremony has been attended by numerous citizens, officials, regional governors, and mayors, however, the decision has angered republicans, who felt betrayed by the former-republican.

Written by: Rene Couchard

Solaris: QuestionTuesdayFTW went on vacation to Morioh for the second time

[MORIOH, Aug 18] The leader of the barren land of Solaris, QuestionTuesdayFTW, is seen vacationing with his friends in Morioh, in particular around the Old Town district. Reportedly he has also seen inside pubs, disco clubs, and for some reason, the University of Morioh complex. His office did not reply to our inquiries.

More to come.

Written by: NerdieSanders

Solaris leader QuestionTuesdayFTW found assassinated in the Morioh river as a failed suicide coverup

[MORIOH, Aug 19] Solaris leader was found dead in the river of Morioh, in front of the Government's Plaza. A gunshot was heard in the area, and blood stains were found on the barriers of the river. The police immediately found the perpetrator before he pledged allegiance to Insane State of Zion and shot himself.

Inside the corpse of QuestionTuesdayFTW is a will that ordered the land of Solaris to be invalidated and void, and transferred all of his builds ownership to the Republic of Canabai.

"This is a sad day for the world," PM Nerdie Sanders said in a public statement today. "A great man whose impartiality led to his own death. Whose impartiality that we needed the most in these troubling times. Whose impartiality that we lost from a bullet filled with extremist ideology and hatred."

The prime minister also ordered all flags to be half-mast, a 21-gun salute at 9:00am at the Parliament, and a procession for the late leader to move through the City of Canabai after the salute.

Many other leaders also sent condolences to the Embassy of Solaris at Canabai City. Thousands of flowers were seen placed by people at the front doors of the embassy.

From the editors of NR: Rest in peace, QuestionTuesdayFTW. May your legacy live on for eternity.

Written by: NerdieSanders

Dorklich Expressway Skyrockets!

[Dorklich, Aug 19th] Mayor of Dorklich, KrebsLovesFiesh, officialy decreed the creation of Dorklich Road Authority, and urgently issued the refurbishment of existing expressway viaduct heading to Dinnertime. The road near Dorklich was widened to 3 blocks per lane, and all pillars were strengthened. Also, junction connecting the expressway with street grid was completely redesigned.

Dorklich Expressway

The newly constructed Dorklich Expressway.

The construction works are part of preparations for constructing a highway connecting Dorklich with cities located on the west of it, like Tarrantia or Fegelein.

Mariusz Max Kolonko, I say how it is!

Written by: ParrotAntics

Laval showcases it's new rolling stock

[Sainte-Vallerie, Laval, Aug 19th] The LR company has showcased it's new and first rolling stock, expected to operate on a line from Sainte-Vallerie (the desert peninsula) to Drapeauville, little is known about this DMU, unless you visited the floating train on Sainte-Vallerie's construction site, it has a "Grand Car" and a "Economy Car." More to come.

Laval Train

Laval's new train.

Rene Couchard out.

Written by: Gaker73

Tagor Leader WQ_Josh found assassinated in XXXTowntacion

[Tagor, Aug 19] Tagor mayor Josh was found dead inside the bar in the small village of XXXTowntacion. Reports say that he was meeting the citizens of the small town, hoping to reduce the poverty rate of the area that has been crippling poor families. After his speech at the town, he was seen drinking at the local XXX bar.

At around 4:00pm this afternoon, an explosion was heard from within the bar. An eyewitness from across the block heard them shout "Viva La Zion" before an explosive device detonated, killing 17 people and injuring 38, as well as completely destroying the bar itself. Among the dead was Tagor mayor Josh.

"This is a very sad day for the UMS, as we have lost 2 great leaders within a span of minutes." said Morioh mayor AlphaSkyRaider. "It is believe that this was a planned attack by the Insane State Of Zion (ISIZ) and we believe that there may be more targets later today", he said before he was driven off in an armored car to an undisclosed location.

This comes just a mere span of minutes after the leader of Solaris, QuestionTuesdayFTW, was killed by another ISIZ member. The National Records believes that ISIZ is trying to target and assassinate different leaders around the world after its city, Zion was destroyed in a bombing by multiple parties. All remaining mayors of major cities have been evacuated into undisclosed locations.

"We will not back down from this fight." says Canabai leader Nerdington. "We will continue to attack these bloody terrorist bastards until every single one of them is dead. We may have lost many lives throughout this war, but we will have the last laugh". Updates on the great UMS war will continue shortly.

Written by: AlphaSkyRaider

Laval conducts airstrikes on ISIZ

[Sainte-Vallerie, Laval, Aug 19th] In retaliation for the deaths of WQ_Josh and QuestionTuesdayFTW, Lavallois Rafales took off from an aircraft carrier and launched missiles towards ISIZ bases, convoys, et cetera, there are reports in which 36 militants were killed, several more injured, 20 vehicles destroyed (it may be alarmist/false), later, the Gendarmerie has stopped ultranationalists from violently celebrating the airstrikes, it also stopped far-left organizations and pro-Zion groups, who clashed with both the Gendarmes and the ultranationalists.

Written by: Gaker73

San Escobar pays tribute to fallen mayors

[Los Vipleros, Aug 20th] Once very joyful country, now it got into mourn. Parliament of San Escobar acclaimed a statement of sharing compassion to people of Solaris and Tagor, whose leaders, QuestionTuesdayFTW and WQ_Josh, were assasinated by fighters of Insane State of Zion.

President of San Escobar, Leoncio Almeida, announced 2-week national mourn. He also declared his will to attend funeral of fallen mayors, alongside with Defence Minister, Colonel Jose Arcadio Morales.

President did not state however, if the armed forces of San Escobar will join the offensive against ISIZ. As he declared: "An oath for every soldier tells they will fight in defence of people of San Escobar. And my will, as their superior, is to make sure, that army will remain loyal to the words of the oath."

Written by: ParrotAntics

Dorklich on partial lockdown

[Dorklich Customs and Immigration Central Office, Dorklich, August 20th of 2018] After several days of Dorklich enduring the unstable politics that has been stirring it up, the mayor (and president) of Dorklich has declared a state of emergency and has closed border traffic to foreigners. Any forged Dorklich passport holder will be arrested on the spot for the crime of forgery. All air, sea, rail and road traffic is to be restricted and any foreigners wishing to travel to Dorklich will need a special permit to enter.

Written by: KrebsLovesFiesh

Tagor: Leader WQ_Josh made a public appearance, doppelganger found dead

[TAGOR, Aug 19] The mayor of Tagor, WQ_Josh, came onto the city's television station to announce a new recycling program live.

The bizarre thing however, is that people thought the mayor was assassinated yesterday.

As it turns out, the mistaken corpse of the mayor was his doppelganger.

"Thanks to Tagor's and allies' amazing intel, we discovered that there were going to be a bomb plot at the bar. The perpetrator of the bombing plot was found and killed on spot," said Tagor's still-living mayor, WQ_Josh.

"Unfortunately, 16 other people died. Those 16 will be given a medal of honor serving this country faithfully. We will strengthen our state's security after this incident."

Written by: NerdieSanders

Eli Maas calls Gaker, a "pedophile" and calls for Gaker being kicked out of Fegelein's senate

[Sainte-Vallerie, Laval, Aug 20] Kesselring Motors CEO, Eli Maas has called the Regent of Laval, Gaker73, a pedophile, refusing to use Maas' technology and machines for the Lavallois Armed Forces. Maas also stated that AlphaSkyRaider should kick Gaker out of the senate for the "sake of the people of Fegelein and the world." There were also reports of 20 petrol/diesel powered vehicles in Laval having their wheels removed and a graffiti of Kesselring's logo on the windshield, the perpetrators were wearing Kesselring uniforms at the time of their arrests, due to this, Kesselring is banned from operating in Laval and an investigation has been launched on the company.(edited)

Written by: Gaker73

August 21, 2018 KrebsLovesFiesh08/21/2018

Dorklich Encourages Cities to Build Embassies In It's Embassy District

[Dorklich Mayor Office, Dorklich, 21st of August, 2018] Dorklich has announced that it will expand the embassy district to accommodate the growing numbers of cities in recent times. All cities are welcome to build an embassy in the district as it strengthens the bond between us, and it also makes diplomatic matters easier to conduct. There are currently 5 plots available so feel free to apply for construction.

Written by: KrebsLovesFiesh

Canabai election August 2018: Social Democrats win largest party, forms absolute majority coalition with Greens, Liberals and Rainbow Bloc.

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Aug 21] The Green Party made the most seats gained, especially in Canabai City and Levanski, with a 15-seat increase compared with the last parliament. This increase came after the Green Overture initiated by Prime Minister Nerdie Sanders when he suggested to remove green space for building. Liberals also won 5 more seats, mostly in Levanski, after promising to create a more relaxed economic model for businesses. Soc Dem, Greens, Liberals, and Rainbow Bloc are in the process of completing a coalition deal, with Sam Jarovy to become the next Prime Minister.

National Coalitions, however, suffered the worst loss in Canabai election history. Only because of this that the Soc Dem gained the largest seat-count in “We’ve done our best, we’ve made an impact, and we would like to congratulate to the ones who have won the elections, especially on the other side of the aisle,” PM Nerdie Sanders conceded in his post-election speech in front of the party’s headquarters. National Coalitions actually made a 4 seat gain, on par with the Soc Dems, in Newport proper, however it is not enough for them to retain their largest count in the parliament.

This election is also a special one, where two new parties enter the parliament for the first time: the Pirate Party, and the Rainbow Bloc. William K, the leader of the party whom we do not know his real identity yet, ran his election campaign in Levanski-East Grid district and won a seat there. He announced that he will send either a robot or another representative on his behalf to protect his anonymity. As for the Rainbow Bloc, which won 1 seat in Canabai City and 2 seats in Levanski, this was a victorious result for their gay cause. “We put our expectations at either no seat, or 1. Winning 4 seats blew everyone out in the campaign HQ,” said Brandon Gaylord, who himself won a seat in Canabai City-Downtown district. “Us gays can finally have a voice advocating shirtless police on the streets!”

After the deadly August raids that occurred from east to west of the server, there is seemingly a rise of far-right movement throughout Canabai. In this election, Canabai Front won an extra 3 seats in the Parliament: one in Canabai City–Downtown hold by the party’s leader, Andrew Anderson; one in Levanski–Downtown; and another one in Newport–Central. The party also lost a seat in Little Saigon to the Communist Party, however Anderson calls this a major victory for Canabai. “For once, the people is realizing how vulnerable the country is,” proclaimed the party’s leader, ”and after the raids and the fires in Canabai, the people have realized that they must take a stand for their nation.”

Written by: NerdieSanders

Zion Ceased It's Existence

[Outer-East Regions of UMS, Aug 21st] An offensive on Insane State of Zion has ended, resulting in total destruction of the landscape. As jointly operating Canabai and Laval forces entered the city and executed the remnants of ISIZ forces, Prime Ministers of those states, Nerdington and Gaker73, ordered total demolition of the remnants. The task was accomplished by Sanostonburg Constructions.

STB-C CEO, Ugultu, allowed the TV staff to record the demolition of the Zion remnants with antimatter weapon. No casualties during the demolition were reported. As reporter said: "Zion was a Pripyat of UMS. 50 thousand people used to live in this city. It became a ghost town. Now it has been torn down."

However, a hunt for remaining agents of ISIZ is still going on. Recent political outbreak in Canabai may expose the rest of the agents hiding on the UMS.

Mariusz Max Kolonko, I say how it is.

Written by: ParrotAntics

Canabai Dept. of State: Canabai did not participate in Zion's destruction

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Aug 21] Right after Oscar Sartre was picked as the new Secretary of State for the new PM Jarovy's cabinet created, he must face a new question brought up by his citizens: whether or not Canabai participated in the destruction of Zion.

"We did not participate, and we did not know when it was happening until it was reported so," said Secretary Sartre at his first press conference. "The early reports indicating Canabai's participation were false. All of our military units were operating within Canabai's soil and airspace, and way even before and after the elections, both governments have agreed that they should not interfere with Zion's demolition."

Written by: NerdieSanders

National Records Attacked

[NATIONAL RECORDS BUILDING, undisclosed location, Aug 24] The online version of the National Records was attacked yesterday (Aug 23). A page was vandalised but was quickly reverted. Canabai Mayor, Nerdie Sanders, today praised the actions of those who quickly reverted the hackers actions. Reports suggest that the hack was the result of ISIZ leader and estranged Mayor of the former city of Z*, N. This however has put into doubt the future of 2 ISIZ members who were caught on Wednesday in Canabai. Whilst they weren't planning any attacks, they may take the flack for their leader's actions, with many saying that they will get the death penalty. Meanwhile, Morioh Mayor, Alpha Sky Raider has threatened to leave the UMS, saying "I'm tired of the drama caused by the leader of ISIZ and I've been offered Mayoral positions in several other servers and one server has even offered me presidency.". More news to follow.

Written by: Jononator

Kesselring disbanded after scandal

[Laval, Aug, 24 (EST)] The Fegelein-based electric car company has been disbanded, after it's CEO resigned when it's revealed that he sent men to remove the engines of petrol/diesel-powered vehicles and slash their tires, the CEO, Eli Maas announced that he will disband the company and put it's assets up for sale, later, it's revealed that a Laval-based electric car company, owned by a brand of the sane nationality, Cherot Motors has brought assets of Kesselring and will produce electric models and also allow Cherot to produce petrol-powered rebadges of it, which was objected by enviromentalists.

Written by: Gaker73


[Los Vipleros, Aug 27th] During his visit to San Escobar, RDPIsOnCrack, the president of Unterganger Minecraft Server, was killed in a attack on his motorcade while heading back to Canabai International Airport. The attack was commenced at the entrance to Los Vipleros - CAN expressway, when his car unsuspectedly exploded, killing him, his driver and 4 security officers. The explosion caused damage of 2 nearby security cars, resulting in rear suspension breakup and flipover of front car (5 officers critically injured) and off-course veering of rear car into the side barriers with 50 km/h speed (driver and one officer dead, 3 others critically injured).

The Parliament of San Escobar, getting on extraordinary session, issued a resolution condemning the attack and obliging Home Affairs Minister to explain the cause of the attack and find the assasin inmediately.

The UMS Council spokeswoman announced the Council will meet as soon as possible to discuss the future of UMS and increase the security of UMS President-elect, Nerdington, former Prime Minister of Canabai.

Written by: Mariusz Max Kolonko, I say how it is.

Fegelein dealer to sell new vehicles after the sale of two cars

[Fegelein, Aug 27 (EST)] Fegelein's "Ferrari" dealer is willing to sell a Genesis G70 and a Alfa Romeo Giulia Quadrifoglio after their two cars, a Lexus GS-F and a Mercedes-Benz E-Class estate has been sold to a one of the locals and a young citizen of Laval [who also resides in Fegelein] respectively. The Genesis and Giulia will respectively cost 67,000F$ and 100,000F$.

Written by: Rene Couchard, a person who loves to report on economy and companies (and sometimes other news).

Simulation forecasts Laval expressways to sustain great damages from car accidents

[LAVAL, Aug 28] A recent Canabai School of Transport simulation of Laval expressways has shown that the road – which does not follow most protocols of the server's standards – will receive lots of car accidents.

Following the publication, the Department of Public Safety of Canabai has issued a statement, saying "Canabaians and others should avoid Laval's road, effective immediately. If the people still needs transportation around the area, use maritime ships in the mean time."

In the abstract of the paper, the authors wrote, "Laval has been putting 100% of its budget to its road development without recognizing the lack of experience that the engineer needs. And thus, many segments, for example one that follows the river valley, has proved to be extremely dangerous due to the changing width of the lanes, and to some extent, even narrower than a car."

The Canabai School of Transportation also included a concession to the Laval, writing, "The researchers here commends Laval's effort to build highways at irregular angles, instead of following cardinal directions like most other nations and contractors are doing."

Written by: NerdieSanders

UMS President Killed By ISIZ Fighter - Assasin Captured And Brought To Court

[Los Vipleros , Aug 28th] The counter-terrorist forces of San Escobar Police have tracked down the assasin who prepared an attack on UMS President yesterday.

The suspect was Immanuel Maccaroni, a Zion citizen, chased by Canabai and Laval security services as the leader of Insane State of Zion. The suspect was arrested and tramsferred to the cell under SE Supreme Court. His trial will be held in two days. If all allegations will be proved, the assasin will receive death penalty, according to local law.

The UMS Council did not comment the issue.

Written by: Mariusz Max Kolonko, I say how it is.

Dorklich Congratulates President-Elect Nerdington

[Dorklich Square Mayor's Office, Dorklich, August 28th of 2018]

"I would like to congratulate you on your rise to the position of president of UMS. We made ourselves sure and for certain, that relations will be better than ever between us and your administration. So may god help you, and may god help us all."

Signed: KrebsLovesFiesh, Mayor of Dorklich

Death for Assasin!

[Los Vipleros, Aug 29th] Immanuel Maccaroni, Insane State of Zion leader and killer of UMS President RDPIsOnCrack, was sentenced to death by unaimous decision of 9 judges of the Supreme Court of San Escobar.

"His guilt was sure. He commited this act with cold blood, and he has shown no regret in this chamber for this crime." - said Chief Justice, Alejandro Gaga. "The evidence were clear that the convict prepared remotely setup bomb, and detonated it in planned moment. Witnesses shared our experience of the event. And I have no right to question their testimonies."

Date of Maccaroni's execution is to be defined, as Justice Minister and General Prosecutor, prof. Antonio Jalapeno, issued a plea to Canabai government for lending one of Canabai prison areas for keeping the convict and the public execution by firing squad. This move has been done due to planned construction of state-run prison between De Mono and Drisden, which is about to start. The law of San Escobar demands all executions to be performed in prisons, allowing all citizens living in the districts to witness them. Only families of the convict have a duty to attend the execution, other citizens can attend them voluntairly. "I started negotiations of the contract with Ministry of Infrastructure and Architecture about starting construction of the prison" - said Minister Jalapeno.

UPDATE: The public broadcast from the courtroom caused 20 other fighters of ISIZ to willingly report them to the police stations in Laval and Dorklich. 10 of the reported people were close partners of Maccaroni. They were arrested and now wait for their trial.

Written by: Mariusz Max Kolonko, I say how it is.

Dorklich declares state of the highest emergency

[Dorklich Mayor's Square Office, Dorklich, 29th day of August, 2018] After the Mayor of Dorklich has received reports of ISIZ activity flaring up, the mayor has decided to declare the state of highest emergency because N** has been reported to enter Dorklich for hiding. A city-wide manhunt will begin and All civilians are to stay indoors. He is expected to escape but Dorklich has closed all outside connections with the world. May god help Dorklich, and may god help us all.

Written by: KrebsLovesFiesh

Former Safe House of ISIZ Leader Found

[Fegelein, Aug 29] A safe house that was home to the former leader of ISIZ during the assassination of QuestionTuesday_FTW and the attempted assassination of WQ Josh as well as the hacking of the National Records, has been found in the city of Fegelein. The building was set alight by 2 members of ISIZ attempting to cover the tracks of their leader. The alarm was first raised when a neighbour smelt petrol and alerted the authorities. The 2 ISIZ members managed to escape the building but were quickly apprehended 3 blocks away. Fortunately, the damage to the apartment was confined to the bathroom and the authorities were able to find sufficient evidence to confirm that the ISIZ leader had been resided in the building during those attacks.

Fegelein mayor Gaker73, praised the actions of the Neighbour and the authorities and promised to stamp ISIZ out of Fegelein. "Fegelein will not tolerate ISIZ and we will drive them into the sea if we have to!" he said. "I advise any ISIZ member living in Fegelein to hand themselves into the Police or suffer the deire consequences. I would also like to thank those who helped with today's incident and and wish luck to any ISIZ member who dares step foot in Fegelein!"

Meanwhile, reports suggest that the ISIZ leader has fled the server although the President Nerdie Sanders said he thinks he may return." I reckon he may yet return. The temptation to come back and cause more attacks is too great for him. His empire is also falling apart and any good leader would try to stitch it back together or die trying." the President said.

More news to follow.

Written by: Jononator

Anomaly reported across server

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Aug 29] Across the server, many reports suggested that the people are unable to move as quick as they used to, or how many are somehow seeing visions of them stepping and falling into the void.

Many police departments in major cities and nations along with bomohs and wizards in UC are investigating into the causes of the anomaly. "We had to gain access to visions in the fourth dimension to understand the underlying forces affecting everyone," said one bomoh, Wak Temberang. "So far, our progress has been pointing towards a supernatural force that no mortals can see."

"We have put out an advisory, telling people to stay home. Many governments, like Parliament of Canabai, have initiated a state of emergency for the next few days, and that people have to stay home to avoid the anomalies. Employers are also forced to initiate their paid leave policies on these days," said the Police Chief of City of Canabai, Alfred Peerenboom. "Of course, we don't understand whatever the bomohs are talking about, but we'll see what they have to offer."

Written by: NerdieSanders

Unterganger City mysteriously disappeared

[ATHYRAS, Aug 30] Unterganger City, along with many of their inhabitants, disappeared overnight as many slept through. The current area is now barren with only grassland. The self-teleporter contraption is also not working because it also disappeared with the city.

"This is unexplainable," said one surviving bomoh, Wak Temberang, who was in Canabai City cooperating with the city's police department. "All of my colleagues who resided in Unterganger City are now captured by the orang bunians. I cannot figure this mystery without their help."

Many investigation unit thought this event could be connected with the limbo anomaly reported yesterday, however no one could explain. "That weird man explained that the external forces in the other dimensions is to blame, which might made sense because we could not trace anything to the cause in this world. Maybe someone in the fifth dimension might have hammered this world," said one investigator, while his colleagues looked at him in disapproval.

Developing story.

Written by: NerdieSanders


Canabai Front: The gays support ISIZ!

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Sep 1] Andrew Anderson, Canabai Front's party leader, accuses Rainbow Bloc of terrorism in the World.

"They bring out the rainbow color as their pride and identity, but they only do so to put a positive light for them! This is because in behind closed doors, they discuss with ISIZ. Insane State of Zion! And they do that to control Canabai with violence!" exclaimed Anderson at one of his rallies, held at 1.9 Plaza.

Many of Canabai Front supporters cheered on, while many others who identify with National Coalition or Social Democrats ignored them. "Madness," said former prime minister Nerdie Sanders (NC). "They can't even bring out an actual reason for others to support, and now they're putting the blame on the gays."

Written by: NerdieSanders

Ultranationalists claim that their government collaborated with ISIZ

[Laval, Sept 1 (EST)] The ultranationalists of Laval is now claiming that the current chief executive of Laval, Jean Villard is colluding with ISIZ to fake his attacks, and supply them with weapons. Their argument is defended by their usage of 3 Leclerc MBTs, however, the pro-government concluded that the Leclercs were captured during battles with Lavallois forces, and there were plausible evidence of the government's conclusion, despite that, ultranationalists attempted to raid Laval's Constitutional Court, calling for Villard to be impeached and executed "for his crimes," they were soon countered by radical leftists, with the national police intervening.

Written by: Gaker73

Dorklich Mayor assassinated by Canabai officials after he was exposed working with ISIZ

[Dorklich, Sep 2] Dorklich mayor KrebsLovesFiesh has been shot dead in front of his mansion in Dorklich early this morning. The controversial mayor was recently exposed donating money, supplies and troops to the Insane State Of Zion, a now dying but still active terrorist organization that continues to terrorize people to expose what they call the flaw. Krebs stated yesterday in an official statement denying the claims of helping the fund for ISIZ despite there being document and even video evidence of him visiting ISIZ owned areas. Just this morning, the president of Canabai, NerdieSanders, decided to hire some troops to seize the Dorklich mayor's house, where they shot him dead after he went outside to get the newspaper. More of this developing story later today.

Written by: AlphaSkyRaider

Laval uses newly-delivered aircraft to airstrike ISIZ

[Laval, Sept 1 (EST)] Right after receiving nine Rafales, Laval's air force used these weapons to airstrike several ISIZ outposts. Lavallois living in the Vieux-Iles region has heard the noise of jet fighters, and looking closely, the Rafales were taking-off from Laval's (currently) only air-base, Joan-de-Arc. The Rafales returned to the airbase, hours later. The MoD of Laval has this to say to a crowd at Joan-de-Arc's vincinity:

"The fighter jets you say taking-off in the morning are the brand-new fighter jets our armed forces use, to weaken those terrorists, who has an obsession with the "flaw," the terrorists are the flaw and the scum of the world of the UMS."

Later on, a report by the military was released and it concluded that the Rafales has destroyed:

> A convoy of five (fourth-gen) Mitsubishi Tritons and two BMP-2s, all carrying troops. > A small base housing three Su-27 "Flankers," a T-72, and 7 (J70) Toyota Land Cruiser pickups. > Shot down three MiG-29 "Fulcrums" trying to shoot a Lavallois C-17 Globemaster, a Lavallois E-767 and another Lavallois military aircraft, A330 MRTT.

None of the nine Rafales were downed.

Written by: Rene Couchard

PA gets into Dorklich campaign

[Dinnertime, Dorklich, Sep 2nd] ParrotAntics, up to this day Deputy Mayor of Tarrantia, announced he'll run in Dorklich election for becoming a Mayor. As he said: "I contributed to this town with heart. Now I want to make Dorklich great again. I'll drain the swamp when I get into office."

He made no further comments about details of his campaign.

Written by: Mariusz Max Kolonko, I say how it is!

Blackmonville commisar accepts offers for landmark!

[Blackmonville, Sep 2nd] We announce that we are looking for the best offer of making a landmark of our town: a Jee-senpai monument. Offers can be given up to Sep 7th. It must contain how it should be made and for what price. Predicted value of the contract is 64 diamond blocks.

Signed: Blackmonville Commissar JoJo Brudzinsky.


[Port Random, Sep 2] 2 former Dorklich officials were spotted escaping the town in a vehicle linked to ISIZ by members of the Canabai Military. They called upon the assistance of Laval who sent a drone to track the vehicle. The vehicle was tracked to Port Random where they stopped to enter an awaiting boat. The vehicle was then destroyed by a missile, killing the 2 occupants.

Canabai Officials then swarmed the boat where a single ISIZ member is holding the owner of the boat hostage.

Stay tuned for this developing story.

Written by: Jononator


[Port Random, Sep 2] Almost 5 hours after the hostage situation started, Canabai Officials are still at the scene - with no end in sight. Top experts from around the UMS have been brought in to help end the crisis. Chief Fegelein Hostage Negotiator Morris Flint, has said; "This is a tough situation. We gather the kidnaper wants to escape the server unhindered and is demanding a car to take him to Haviland airport where the hostage will be released and he will escape in an awaiting aircraft." The hostage has been named locally as Phyllis Birds Eye, a local fisherman and owner of the boat where he his being held.

Elsewhere, the former personal assistant of KrebsLovesFiesh has handed over files & evidence of Krebs' visits to ISIZ leader, N * * in return for witness protection. Meanwhile, 4 former Dorklich officials were captured at Canabai Int. Airport, attempting to leave the server on false documents. They are currently in secure detention.

Written by: Jononator


[Port Random - Sep 3] Almost 29 hours after it began, the hostage situation in Port Random finally ended after the kidnapper was shot dead by the best Canabai Marksmen. The first hostage, 67 year Fisherman Phyllis Birds Eye was swiftly removed from the boat and taken to an undisclosed hospital by air ambulance. Authorities have removed the body of the ISIZ member, who will be ejected into space during an undisclosed supply mission to the ISS.

In other news, ISIZ is calling for the body of disgraced former Dorklich Mayor Krebs to be given a state funeral. UMS President Nerdie Sanders responded to the ISIZ members by saying "OVER MY DEAD BODY!!! That twat twat is being ejected into space whether ISIZ likes it or not! He is scum who actively helped ISIZ and N * * as well as funding them. May his soul rot in hell.

Written by: Jononator

Jean Villard spotted cosplaying as Doraemon in a convention

[Laval, Sept 3] Laval'a chief executive, Jean Villard has been spotted in a anime convention, cosplaying as the main character of a famed anime, Doraemon. He was said to have his face covered with a mask that resembles the head of Doraemon, wearing Doraemon costumes as well.

The anime/manga, Doraemon is successful in some parts of the UMS world, with sales of Doraemon and merchandise being very high in Sanostonburg, where it's head of state, Ugultu is known to be a fan of Doraemon.

Written by: Rene Couchard

RTN Tudor is Out, Random is In

[Unterganger City, Sept 4] Rail Transit Network yesterday announced the renaming of Tudor Line to Random Line.

Its Director Alejandro Huentes in a press conference said this is done to reduce confusion to commuters, which partly contribute to falling ridership.

"We receive a lot of complaints of passangers trying to buy tickets to stations on the former tudor Line but accidentally bought one on the Templer Line, and vice versa," he said. This is because both lines shared the same initials, and RTN's internal ticketing system issue tickets with the station code included. He added that the lapse in management in the past 3 years has allowed this to happen, and that "we're fixing that now."

He noted that this is part of a series of reforms to be executed across the RTN, to increase ridership and add more connectivity with other rail operators, the full details of which will be announced soon.

The Random Line takes its name from its principal terminus at Port Random.

Written by: Kimilil


[Canabai, Sep 6] The disgraced former mayor of Dorklich KrebsLovesFeish, had his private jet buzzed for over 400 miles on one visit to meet the ISIZ leader, it has been revealed. This information came from documents and information handed over to the authorities by his former personal assistant. His aircraft started being followed by 2 military aircraft shortly after it took off from Canabai Int. Airport, just over 2 weeks before he was killed outside his mansion. It was followed for 438 miles before the military aircraft had to return to a base due to low fuel - the military confirmed. The investigation into Krebs' activities with ISIZ continues.

Written by: Jononator



Bus plunges into Nerdie River, killing 7

[Canabai City, Canabai, Nov 2] Canabai Prime Minister Trevor Tadlock declared a 3 day period of mourning after a Transport for Canabai bus plunged into the Nerdie River, killing all 7 occupants on board. The TfC bus was on a pilot route to determine feasible routes for the Canabai Bus Network.

"Surveillance footage from the bus shows a passenger assaulting the bus driver in the final critical moments before the bus drove off the bridge into the river. It appears that the bus driver had failed to stop at the passenger's stop, and demanded the bus stop so she could get off, to which the bus driver refused. This is a very tragic incident, and our condolences go out to the family of the victims," read an official statement from TfC.

"We would really like to build an effective bus network in Canabai so that residents can reliably access public transport. Unfortunately, we have had to suspend our bus pilot in the wake of this incident. I extend my condolences to the victims of this extremely tragic incident," Canabai Advisor Beltaos told the National Records.

Prime Minister Trevor Tadlock declared a national period of mourning following the news.

Written by: Georgio Beltaos

A Tarrantian teenager nails the competition

[Tarrantia, Nov 2nd] This is pretty historic victory in the term of UMS-set gameshows. On tonight's game of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?, Matthew Dupnitsky, an 18-year old student from Tarrantia, has answered 15 questions within 20 minutes of the game and won 1 million pounds. The victory is more remarkable because of not using any of available 3 lifelines.

"I was completely astounded... This boy has a knowledge of a PhD in such young age. I had to study for over 10 years to get the same level knowledge." - commented Hubert Urbański, the host of the game. He added: "I guess we won't ever have another chance to get the similar player."

"What am I going to do with the prize? I got so many ideas... I can't precise it right now." - that's the response of young champion.

Written for National Records, by Dick Dobrovolsky, from Tarrantia.

24 dead after extreme car crash at Highway 100 toll station

[Port Random, Canabai, Nov 5] 24 people are dead and another 69 people were injured after a Krebs Fish and Maps Company truck lost control at the Highway 100 toll station at Port Random, causing a 47 car pileup.

The cause of the crash is under investigation, although the truck driver has told authorities that his breaks failed on final approach to the toll booth. The driver plowed through 25 cars in the southbound lanes, 3 southbound toll booths, the main toll station building, 5 northbound toll booths, and an additional 22 cars in the northbound lanes before coming to a rest on its side.

The crash comes 3 days after a bus plunged off a bridge into the Nerdie River, killing all 7 occupants on board. Highway 100 between Exits 6 and 8 will be closed in both directions until further notice.

Written by: Georgio Beltaos

Stb prosecutes Dongdi for increasing racial discrimination

[Mainland, Sanostonburg, Nov 5] Stb prime minister Ugultu went full Bonkers yesterday when he saw a post from Dongdi leader.

Dongdese leader had posted a picture with title "STB's embassy in Dongdi." and there was a dead cockroach with a yellow tie sitting in a cardboard desk, ultimately implying the Stb version of N-word, Sanosroach and "best Sanoska dead Sanoska."

Former Solaris leader was also seen in the comments section, reacting with "Lmao" slang which angered Ugultu even more.

As of right now, Dongdese leader and former Solaris leader are going to be sent to the international court, latter having less accusions. It looks like controversies between Dongdi and Stb is going to ascend again.

Written by: Ugultu

Trial of Former Dorklich Mayor KrebsLovesFiesh Begins Today

[Fegelein, Nov 5] The trial of the disgraced former mayor of Dorklich, KrebsLovesFiesh began today. The dead mayor is charged with funding terrorism and inciting terrorism.

He was killed in September by Canabai special forces outside of his residence in a gated community after he was found to have funded ISIZ.

We will report more as the trial continues.

Written by: Jononator

National Records journalist died from apparent suicide

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Nov 7] Leon Bishop, a well respected National Records journalist, was found dead at the base of the NR West headquarter. Early reports from the police has shown that this is an apparent suicide, and according to some witnesses, many saw the late journalist falling from the rooftop of the headquarter.

His family has declined to comment on this matter; his colleagues however has said that this is a great loss to the team. "He was such a phenomenal journalist and writer. His coverage and analysis on the general elections was very well made and insightful," said his colleague, Vladimir Kaminski. "He has shown some depression signs to us, but it seemed like no one here picked it up."

"It's probably because of the elections that has been scaring him," said his editor, Ronald Abbott. "I have seen him groaning and dreading the current state of politics."

From the editors of National Records: May you be in peace, Leon Bishop.

Written by: NerdieSanders

KrebsLovesFiesh found guilty of all charges

[FEGELDORF, Fegelein, Nov 7th] Disgraced former Dorklich mayor KrebsLovesFiesh has been found guilty in court of all charges. The charges are; -27 counts of Funding Terrorism -115 counts of Inciting Terrorism -6 counts of Breaking Into Buildings -43 counts of Space Violation -12 counts of Treachery -300+ counts of Horrible Aesthethics

He is due to be sentenced next Monday.

More news to follow.

Written by: Jononator and Ugultu

Hell Station's Digital Advertising Screens hacked to show anime porn

[Hell Station, Lucek Memorial Line, 8 Nov] The Digital Advertising Screens at Hell station on the Lucek Memorial Line were hacked this morning and displayed anime porn for "several minutes". The explicit images stayed up for approximately 12 minutes before the screens were shut down by an engineer.

Police confirmed they were called to the station just before 10:30 this morning to reports of explicit images being displayed in public and that they have started an investigation. They also urged anyone involved in hacking the screens to come forward.

The Redstone Railway Company, who owns the station, confirmed in a statement that the screens were hacked due to a fault that allowed passengers to edit what was on the screen if they were using the station WiFi. They also said that they are launching an investigation into the matter and will assist the police in their investigations.

RRC CEO & Owner, ParrotAntics, apologised for any offence caused by the images and promised to reimburse passengers who were affected by the hack.

Written by: Jononator

Based off:

National Coalition and allies attack PM Tadlock and Govt. for economy slump

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Nov 10] Canabai has seen two continuous recessions within the last 3 months, and the conservative wing of the Parliament has accused the current government for creating "anti-economy" policies.

"PM Tadlock and his friends have only created chaos and ruptures in our economy, unlike their 'prosperity' promises they have done on their campaigning trail," said National Coalition leader, Nerdie Sanders. "Under my administration we have created a stable economy and stable life in Canabai, but now we ended up with recessions after recessions. It's unbelievable!"

The PM's Office has responded that they will work to fix the nation's economy by investing in industries and infrastructure, spending more in maintaining our rails and roads system, and incentivizing small businesses within towns and cities.

Written by: NerdieSanders

Stb leader found E in his (non-existent) office

[MAINLAND, Sanostonburg, Nov 10] @canabai advisor beltaos was questioned about their involvement.

Written by: Ugultu

Canabai University announces new Engineering disciplines, will be suspending admissions for another for Fall 2019

[Newport, Canabai, Nov 16] Canabai University's School of Architecture, Construction, and Engineering (SACE) announced the new Engineering disciplines that will officially begin in Fall 2019, as admissions open to the public for the Fall 2019 term today.

David Lao, Dean of the SACE announced in a press conference the addition of Aerospace Engineering, Chemical Engineering, Biomedical Engineering, and Mechatronics Engineering to the selection of programs prospective students could apply for, with classes starting in Fall 2019.

"I am very excited that with the official opening of the admission form for the Fall 2019 term, we have 4 new programs for you to choose from, managed by SACE. We hope that you can pursue your passion here with us in the future," David Lao told reporters at the press conference.

Unfortunately, students looking to enroll in UCanabai's Electrical / Computer Engineering (ECE) program will be unable to do so for the 2019-2020 academic term, after a professor teaching ECE 1597, the mandatory Ethics class, dismissed his classes after revelations that students were taking advantage of an online quiz system to skip lectures, yet still get participation marks. The University is investigating, and is considering expulsion for students found guilty.

Due to an incident last month which saw a number of students failing midterms on purpose in order to benefit from a bell curve, the University has decided to suspend the ECE Program entirely for one year in order to fix organizational issues seemingly present in the ECE Program. All current ECE Students will be required to transfer to other programs, but as a result, will have first priority for admissions for the new Fall 2019 programs.

Written by: Georgio Beltaos

Lavallois official criticizes the death of Junkers

[Laval, November 17] Laval’s Foreign Minister had denounced Fegelein for the death of Junkers Stuka, he claimed that the killing was ill-justified, and called for the UMS Supreme Court to place charges of murder on Fegelein mayor AlphaSkyRaider, and to impose sanctions on Fegelein.

Written by: Rene Couchard

Avoid eating romaine lettuce in Levanski and Canabai City amid E. coli outbreak, health officials warn

[Canabai City, Canabai, Nov 20th] The Public Health Agency of Canabai is warning people in Canabai City and Levanski not to eat romaine lettuce as it works with U.C. health officials to determine the source of an outbreak of E. coli infections in the two cities and in 11 NPC villages.

As of Tuesday, there have been 18 confirmed cases of the bacterial infection in Canabai, the agency said in a notice posted on its website. Fifteen cases of the illnesses were in Canabai City and three were in Levanski.

"Currently, there is no evidence to suggest that residents in other parts of Canabai are affected by this outbreak," the notice said.

The illnesses believed to be associated with the outbreak began in mid-October and the risk appears to be "ongoing," the Public Health Agency of Canabai said.

"Recent illnesses indicate that contaminated romaine lettuce may still be on the market, including in restaurants, grocery stores and any establishments that serve food," it said.

The warning includes pre-made salad mixes containing romaine lettuce.

Although no deaths have been reported, six people were hospitalized, the agency said. 

The strain of bacteria in this outbreak, called E. coli O157, is the same one that appeared in another outbreak linked to romaine lettuce in December 2017, which also affected people in Canabai and U.C.

Written by: AlphaSkyRaider

Former PM Jarovy posts a video of him burying lettuce

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Nov 20] Former PM Sam Jarovy uploaded a video of him burying his lettuce and washing the container agressively to increase public awareness on the new e. coli outbreak in Canabai.

Written by: NerdieSanders

Rosanna Line officially opens service from Soweto to Fodania

[FODANIA, Nov 20] The first rail service started this morning, running from Soweto to Fodania. Spanning at approximately 3km, Rosanna Line is the first line operated by Toto Railways.

At the opening ceremony of the line in Soweto, CEO of Toto Railways, Joseph Williams, thanked Kimilil Construction for the rails built from Soweto to Sutton, and Kim and Ned JV for the rails built from Sutton to Fodania. Williams also thanked CanaTrans Ltd. for consulting and overseeing the project. "Thanks to all of these peeps that we all came together and banded these small villages together in the West. These first baby steps will brew itself into something bigger," the CEO announced.

PM Tadlock also made an appearance at the opening ceremony. "Because of this railways, not only it would benefit Toto Railways, but it would also bring in opportunities to the villages and Fodania itself as we all now have a band together to ride on with and work together. Together, we will prosper."

After the ceremony, many officials including PM Tadlock and CEO Williams, were among the firsts to ride on the line's first service running from Soweto to Fodania. "The lines here are looking great. These peeps from the constructions did a terrific job," noted Williams.

There were also near future plans discussed by Williams at the ceremony. "We will indeed expand our grounds to Los Vipleros and its environs, starting from Fodania. We are also looking into the possibility of operating to Orpiment, and across the West Sea."

Written by: NerdieSanders

Canabai Postal Service walks off the job - a day before Black Friday

[Canabai City, Canabai, Nov 22] Canabai Postal Service workers walked off the job today to protest the proposed compensation cuts that were announced by the company earlier this month.

Josh Trelford of the Canabai Postal Service Union (CPSU) told the National Records that the proposed compensation cuts were basically "a slap in the face" to workers who deal with crazy drivers, slippery sidewalks, and angry customers on a daily basis. The proposed cuts would have seen salaries slashed by 8%, compensation payments slashed by 47%, and 350 full time positions slashed.

"I'm very disappointed that the company has refused to listen to our cries that these cuts are unethical and unfair to the workers. They are only trying to cut costs whereever possible, and as a result, we are going on strike to tell the company to listen to us."

This comes as a major blow as Black Friday, Cyber Monday, and the contentious holiday season approach. Many consumers now worry they will be unable to do any online shopping this year due to the strike.

Written by: QuestionTuesdayFTW

One of the 10 richest people in Canabai moans about the new anti-fossil fuel posters

[Canabai, Nov 23] Multi-Billionaire Wilbur Matlock, moaned on Twitter today about the new anti-fossil fuel posters released by the Tadlock administration. He said; "These posters are slanderous against us ICE users! I have reported them to the advertising authority and the Police for being false & breaching my human rights!"

The Canabai Hydrogen Vehicle Council responded to Mr Matlock's tweet with the following statement; These posters released by Trevor Tadlock's government are designed to promote people to move away from fossil fuels. While we don't think they were well executed, we agree with the message these posters are making. We would also like to remind Mr Matlock that he could easily buy every Hydrogen and Battery Electric car currently on sale, as well as his properties, car collection and entire empire, and still have money spare.

Mr Matlock, who owns over 120 cars, including 12 Ferrari's, 10 Lamborghini's and 2 vintage double decker buses that don't have catalytic converters, declined to speak to us but later posted a video to his Twitter, saying he would "appose Tadlock's plans at every turn" and if PM Tadlock's plans go ahead, he said; "I will take my taxes to somewhere that actually appreciates me, probably Fegelein."

Story written by: Torger Horner

Confusion as UMS Immigration Opens and Closes repeatedly

[Unterganger City, 26 November] People across the UMS were baffled by the action of the UMS Immigration Office, which have been closing and opening ports of entries multiple times within the span of a day. Some were surprised after finding out their port of entry's number were also changed, a second within the third quarter of this year.

"This un-explainable instability with our points of entry seem to point at problems within our immigration system, which purportedly runs on bash terminals, a command-line interface ubiquitous with pre-90s computing," says Dr. Hakka Mann from UC School of Technology. "Repeated external attempts to infiltrate our UMS also played a role."

The UMS Immigration Office has declined to comment at the moment.

Fatal Blow to RRC - Terminal for Kasparov Line Must Be Torn Down

[Eston Post, Nov 27th] Redstone Railway Company can't call this day very happy. Northeast Railway decided to not use RRC-built terminal station and proposed relocation of platforms. That move caused a loss of RRC actions' value on Unterganger City Stock Exchange, causing drop of company's net value to 5 million diamonds from 7.5 million last day. But that's not the end of problem for RRC. As we've just been informed, the station will be removed from it's current location back to workshop in Sacramento, where it will wait for brighter future.

Written by: Mariusz Max Kolonko, I say how it is!

Manifestations in major cities: Get Kimilil to UMS Council!!!

[Fegelein, Levanski, Morioh, Nov 28th]Groups of manifestants gathered in the central parts of Fegelein, Levanski and Morioh, just to give one call: Introduce Kimilil into UMS Council!

More news to be added.

Written by: Mariusz Max Kolonko, I say how it is!

Little Saigon: Get out.

[LITTLE SAIGON, Canabai, Nov 29] Thomas Sauvage, the newly elected communist mayor of Little Saigon, has taken an aggressive stand against non-communists and opponents of his government.

Earlier in the month, the mayor issued an order to move the Little Saigon Revolution memorial to somewhere outside of the town. "This memorial is a glorified symbol of our downfall, which we cannot accept. As we will prosper, we should not remind ourselves again of our nightmares, but rather our dreams," the mayor announced in one of his weekly radio announcements.

To avoid possible violence in the town, his opponents complied as they moved the memorial across the Red River. However, they put the memorial directly across the old NPC square. "Funnily enough, this is the moderate's middle finger to the communist mayor," said one political observer in National Records.

After the removal of the memorial, Mayor Sauvage is now targeting Canabai Library and Archive situated right in the heart of the town. "All these books and none of them is used by students, I'm not entirely sure why we should have it!" he said in his radio shows. "Instead of wasting our laborers' taxes for a useless cinder block, I think we must have more housing projects for our rising population."

Scholars are now scrambling, don't know what to do. Many are trying to sneak out books and store in their private homes, while others are pressuring Canabai City to take actions. "We are proposing a new library that is accessible for everyone, instead of one that can be potentially closed off to the world," said the CEO of an academic thinktank, Carol Briggs. "That way, we can at least save ourselves from losing our valuable knowledge to authoritarian communists."

What more of the Little Saigon Crisis as we are seeing shall be played out in the upcoming general election.

Written by: NerdieSanders

Parliament of Canabai dissolves for upcoming general election

[CANABAI CITY, Canabai, Nov 30] The Parliament of Canabai has officially dissolved by the government in time for the upcoming election. The PM's government decided to dissolve the Parliament one day early for extra time to campaign because of the contested Little Saigon Crisis.

All parliamentary businesses has arrived to an end, and that there will be no meetings until the next Parliament is elected. Tours through the Parliament are still conducted, but an announcement has made to tourists that they will not be able to watch the MPs debate and conduct their meetings.

Many reports from senior officials of some parties claimed that the party meetings right after dissolution talked about their official positions on the Little Saigon Crisis in their HQs. One reported even claimed that they would support Little Saigon no matter what.

Written by: NerdieSanders